Ask Dr Rom!

[LadyIrina]

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
Due to the summer vacation in Lost, we've been so fortunate as to secure one of the show's greatest characters to this thread and he'll be taking questions from the LF users to share his endless wisdom!
Yes, it's true, ladies and gentlemen, Dr Ethan Rom has agreed to help you out with all your troubles!
Due to rabid fan girls, Ethan will be mailing me his replies from a safe hatch, but you can be sure that his answers will reach you within reasonable time!
Take advantage of this wonderful chance people! Ask away!
There's nothing Dr Rom doesn't know!


(This is just for fun, people! I do not own the characters in this thread, nor do I own any rights to the television show "Lost". They were created by JJ Abrams and Damon Lindelof and they belong to them, Touchstone, and ABC. Ethan's opinions and statements are not related to the aforementioned, or William Mapother.)

And because of his incredible skills, Dr Rom has already received a few questions to begin with, and here are his replies!
http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/9532/drromyeah1wd.jpg

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr Rom
I have a hobbit who works in my office, he sits just opposite me and he's putting me off my work because I keep sniggering everytime I see his hobbit hairstyle. I can't concentrate on my work as a result. I cant complain because he's not breaking any rules. I've learnt recently that you've had experience in dealing with irritating hobbit wannabies, is there anything you can suggest without resorting to violence or using a noose?

Thanks in anticipation

PS. Why do people always phone me when I'm eating. Drives me insane!
http://img54.imageshack.us/img54/3188/drromsyringe8yk.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Mr Ice

Hobbits can be very disruptive at a work place, and you have the dilemma of being unable to pinpoint what he does wrong except existing.
I can also understand the urgency of your situation, but I would not recommend a hasty solution like a sneak-attack with scissors, yet abide your time. If you find this person likable, his hobbitness hairstyle aside, I suggest you slip him some Otherwater and 'suggest' a trip to a hairstylist. If his disruptiveness goes beyond bad hair, order a hotel room in his name, the entire room service menu, limmos, and dating services, and send the bill to your company. I doubt his hair will bother you any more after your boss sees that bill.
Always glad to help!

Dr Rom.

PS. There's an undercover organisation that exist only to bother people while they're eating, usually by phone, but occassionally with the odd door-ringing as well. They have small detectors installed in the wall that alerts the HQ when food is being prepared. They have yet to be stopped...

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr Rom
So, what is the answer to LOST, the Universe, and Everything?
Do you plan to vote for Sayid?
Will killer rabbits from outerspace invade my room?
Does rendered animal fat really cure jowls?
http://img486.imageshack.us/img486/6471/drromprofile7ek.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Jade

The answer to everything is of course 42. I thought everyone knew that by now?
Considering that Sayid has never punched me or shoved my face into really nasty mud, he has my vote for now, yes.
Killer rabbits from outerspace... You have been sipping Otherwater again, haven't you? Well, the bunnies called and said their attack has been postponed for another few months...
As for rendered animal fat's ability to cure things, it all depends on how you prepare it. I suggest you seek out John Locke for recipes!
Always glad to help!

Dr Rom.

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
Alright, that was it for now, but I'm certain you all have many questions to ask this wonderful Other!
In the future, there might even be a guest appearance by the Losties as well!
So go on, people!
Ask Dr Rom!

[Ice Berg Legend]

Dear Mr Ice

Hobbits can be very disruptive at a work place, and you have the dilemma of being unable to pinpoint what he does wrong except existing.
I can also understand the urgency of your situation, but I would not recommend a hasty solution like a sneak-attack with scissors, yet abide your time. If you find this person likable, his hobbitness hairstyle aside, I suggest you slip him some Otherwater and 'suggest' a trip to a hairstylist. If his disruptiveness goes beyond bad hair, order a hotel room in his name, the entire room service menu, limmos, and dating services, and send the bill to your company. I doubt his hair will bother you any more after your boss sees that bill.
Always glad to help!

Dr Rom.

PS. There's an undercover organisation that exist only to bother people while they're eating, usually by phone, but occassionally with the odd door-ringing as well. They have small detectors installed in the wall that alerts the HQ when food is being prepared. They have yet to be stopped...

:crackup:

Thank you so much Dr Rom, come Monday morning I'm going to slip some 'other' substance into the water-cooler and then while he's dazed inform him that hip-hobbits now have shorter hair :D If that fails I'm ordering him the presidential suite at a swanky London Hotel!

[Hatsumomo]

Dear Dr. Rom,

Recently I've developed a rather obsessive need to collect nooses. I have them everywhere; on keychains, stuffed nooses, noose shaped pillows, posters of nooses. Is this wrong? If so, would you be able to recommend a Noose Addicts Anonymous program near me?

Thank you so much
--Nervous Nooser---

[bookworm]

Dr. Rom,

I have a very scary problem and I hope you can help. My family and I have planned a vacation for a week this summer, and I will be unable to be on the Lost Forum during this time. I am sure I am not the only person this has happened to, and yet, I fear it could be a very trying time. Could you tell me what kind of withdrawl symptoms I can expect, and how to survive this life-altering situation? Thank you in advance for all of your wisdom.

Yours in Eclaire,
bookworm

[ehsteve]

Dr. Rom,
i dont ask much, i know you're a busy other, othernapping, dressing up, doing surgery for leisure etc. but i have had a recurring dream, in the dream, i'm about 3 foot tall, have an annoying voice, cannot play the guitar to save my life and kidnap babies. in the most recent one, i woke up in the jungle with a terrible neck pain, only to realise i was hanging from a tree, i dunno how i got down, but before i knew it, a big bald guy was pnching me, then i almost got hit with a fork, then i was kissing a hot blonde aussie chick!
i'm not complainng about the last bit, but how the hell do i stop the rest of it? i't been affecting my real life, i've had tendencies to walk around on my knees, and yell "i'm a bloody rock god" and sing the worst song ever written!
Help me!
yours
Scott

[Paul K Flameboy]

Dear Dr. Rom,

I know a very close person to me who is really ill. It will eventually kill this person if he/she doesn't get help in the next year or so. I was wondering if you knew any resorts that would be rather theraputic for my pet monkkk... I mean he or she... to spend the rest of his or her days in peace. I doubt there are any places in the world with such healing abilities, but I knew you would know the place if such a place exsists.

P.S. Also Dr. Rom I keep having this dream about a bald guy on an island screaming, "Don't tell me what I can't do"!, as these heiroglyphics flash by while a super athletic black guy with a bloody scripture covered stick in one hand and an axe in the other builds a church with a drug addict playing this horrible little pop song that I can't get out of my head. There is also an airplane, a polar bear, an incredicably cute Australian blonde girl who kept shouting your name (which is where I got the idea to write you), her baby, who was baptised by the previously mentioned axe-weilding black man, and kidnapped by the pop star, and finally these strange, ugly, barefoot people who put bags over the heads of four crash survivors, letting one, an enormously obese hippy with numbers tatooed on his forehead, free. The obese man ran into the jungle where he was attacked by a giant green bird of prey that screeched his name... Hurley, I believe. THERE IS ALSO an Arab man (possibly Iraqi) who keeps torturing this long-haired, slick looking con man who calls him, "Freckles" in Korean, while making pumpkin pie with a talking golden retreiver who yells, "WAAALLT!". This Iraqi is named Sayid, and he kills all of the barefoot survivornappers. Oh and headsup: at the end of the dream, the babynapping, drug-taking, has been Vh1 reject kills you. Sure. Like that would ever happen. Anyway Dr. Rom, do you have any idea what this dream means, and help me find a safe haven for my monkey... I MEAN GOOD FREIND!

With greatest respect,
Flameboy

[CutieKitten]

Dear Dr Rom,
Now, You may know me and my ethan song, but there is something really troubling me..you see, I keep getting other-napped by other-nappers. I get very fustrated especially when they won't let me go. But I have escaped by singing the ethan song to them...loudly and repetedly. This always works but I'm getting worried that they are starting to become imune to it...if they end up becoming imune to it then what am I going to do?

Thank you Dr Rom Other Man,

[LadyIrina]

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
I'm happy to see the arrival of new questions for our brilliant doctor! This is truly a unique chance and you're clever people to not let this opportunity slip away from you! :D
Anyway, enough talk from me!
The doctor is in!

http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/9532/drromyeah1wd.jpg


Dear Dr. Rom,http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png

Recently I've developed a rather obsessive need to collect nooses. I have them everywhere; on keychains, stuffed nooses, noose shaped pillows, posters of nooses. Is this wrong? If so, would you be able to recommend a Noose Addicts Anonymous program near me?

Thank you so much
--Nervous Nooser---

http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/5830/drromcute7zg.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Dear Nervous Nooser

First of all, let me say you have nothing to be nervous about.
Collecting nooses is a perfectly normal and healthy hobby. The noose have been worshipped in many cultures though out history and is a symbol of problem solving. They're really practical things to have around the house.
However, it's important that it remains a hobby and that your collecting doesn't effect your everyday life.
Unless you start collecting nooses with actual people in them, I suggest you take a time out every day and take deep breaths while saying; I collect nooses, they do not control me.
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dr. Rom,

I have a very scary problem and I hope you can help. My family and I have planned a vacation for a week this summer, and I will be unable to be on the Lost Forum during this time. I am sure I am not the only person this has happened to, and yet, I fear it could be a very trying time. Could you tell me what kind of withdrawl symptoms I can expect, and how to survive this life-altering situation? Thank you in advance for all of your wisdom.

Yours in Eclaire,
bookworm

http://img103.imageshack.us/img103/9103/drromsyringe8it.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Dear Bookworm

This is indeed a scary problem, and I hope not too many of your fellow LF users has to suffer through this.
I suspect the first day without LF will pass with minor symptoms like random twitches or slight cases of Megsitis, but if your addiction, I mean devotion, to LF is as severe as my assistant, the second and third day will bring restlessness and visions. I suggest you bring Otherwater and papayas to calm yourself down if you see smilies instead of people's faces and the trembling is setting in.
If possible, bring DVDs and pictures of Lost to help you through the worst, or seek out an internet cafe.
But the second you start speaking net-speak, seek medical attention at once!
Best of luck, and you have my sympathy!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dr. Rom,
i dont ask much, i know you're a busy other, othernapping, dressing up, doing surgery for leisure etc. but i have had a recurring dream, in the dream, i'm about 3 foot tall, have an annoying voice, cannot play the guitar to save my life and kidnap babies. in the most recent one, i woke up in the jungle with a terrible neck pain, only to realise i was hanging from a tree, i dunno how i got down, but before i knew it, a big bald guy was pnching me, then i almost got hit with a fork, then i was kissing a hot blonde aussie chick!
i'm not complainng about the last bit, but how the hell do i stop the rest of it? i't been affecting my real life, i've had tendencies to walk around on my knees, and yell "i'm a bloody rock god" and sing the worst song ever written!
Help me!
yours
Scott

http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/916/drromsyringe8od.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Dear Scott

I'll start by saying that I was actually one of the few who didn't believe your supposed death. And many thanks for acknowledging my busy schedule, not many consider how much I have to do as a good Other!
Over to your problem, which is a problem in deed, Pavor Nocturnus is not something that should be dismissed easily. In your case, it's also a severe attack.
A daily dose of Otherwater is recommended, about an hour before you go to bed, and the dreams should disappear. Without the dreams, your behavior should return to normal as well.
Should you start dreaming about being a handsome doctor strolling through the jungle with a beautiful blonde, that's perfectly normal.
If the Otherwater isn't enough to completely remove the dreams, you may have to come in for sessions in my office.
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

I know a very close person to me who is really ill. It will eventually kill this person if he/she doesn't get help in the next year or so. I was wondering if you knew any resorts that would be rather theraputic for my pet monkkk... I mean he or she... to spend the rest of his or her days in peace. I doubt there are any places in the world with such healing abilities, but I knew you would know the place if such a place exsists.

P.S. Also Dr. Rom I keep having this dream about a bald guy on an island screaming, "Don't tell me what I can't do"!, as these heiroglyphics flash by while a super athletic black guy with a bloody scripture covered stick in one hand and an axe in the other builds a church with a drug addict playing this horrible little pop song that I can't get out of my head. There is also an airplane, a polar bear, an incredicably cute Australian blonde girl who kept shouting your name (which is where I got the idea to write you), her baby, who was baptised by the previously mentioned axe-weilding black man, and kidnapped by the pop star, and finally these strange, ugly, barefoot people who put bags over the heads of four crash survivors, letting one, an enormously obese hippy with numbers tatooed on his forehead, free. The obese man ran into the jungle where he was attacked by a giant green bird of prey that screeched his name... Hurley, I believe. THERE IS ALSO an Arab man (possibly Iraqi) who keeps torturing this long-haired, slick looking con man who calls him, "Freckles" in Korean, while making pumpkin pie with a talking golden retreiver who yells, "WAAALLT!". This Iraqi is named Sayid, and he kills all of the barefoot survivornappers. Oh and headsup: at the end of the dream, the babynapping, drug-taking, has been Vh1 reject kills you. Sure. Like that would ever happen. Anyway Dr. Rom, do you have any idea what this dream means, and help me find a safe haven for my monkey... I MEAN GOOD FREIND!

With greatest respect,
Flameboy

http://img103.imageshack.us/img103/9103/drromsyringe8it.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Flameboy

I'm impressed that you care that much about your friend, and it it's a noble question you ask me. I might know about a place, but I have to check with a few Others before I can give out that information. It would just get too crowded if we didn't do it this way, and there are limits to how many people we can Othernap, I mean, treat!
Don't be surprised if a man in ragged clothes and no shoes appears at your house, just be sure to have everything you need for a while within reach.
As for your dream, or should I say nightmare, I suggest the treatment that is stated above. Lot's of Otherwater. Double the dose. And thanks for giving me a good laugh!
Like some VH1 reject could kill me? Yeah, right. Just remember to mail me his description so I can keep an eye out for anyone resembling him...
Thanks

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr Rom,
Now, You may know me and my ethan song, but there is something really troubling me..you see, I keep getting other-napped by other-nappers. I get very fustrated especially when they won't let me go. But I have escaped by singing the ethan song to them...loudly and repetedly. This always works but I'm getting worried that they are starting to become imune to it...if they end up becoming imune to it then what am I going to do?

Thank you Dr Rom Other Man,

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/39/drromprofile29em.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear CutieKitten

Ah, yes, the author of the wonderful Ethan-song! I've heard about you and that song. My assistant sings it for hours some days. I've even had to slip her some Otherwater a few times just to shut her up!
How anyone can get immune to that, I cannot phantom.
However, I will do my best to help you against un-authorised Othernapping!
I suggest a few rounds of 99 Others on the wall or 10 Little Others, and you'd be free before you know it.
Just make sure my assistant doesn't hear them!
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg

Ok, that's what the good doctor had for us this time! I'm certain his answers was pure brilliance, as always, and remember that he will be back again!
Keep asking, and he'll give you his wise replies!
Until next time... *starts singing Ethan-song*

[Hatsumomo]

Thank you so much Dr. Rom! I feel that now I can finally lead a semi-normal life.

[AliCat]

Dear Dr. Rom,

What is a normal life? I've heard Others talking about it, but I'm not certain what they mean. Can you enlighten me?

Sincerely,
Confused In Carolina

And also, this one is from my son:

Dear Dr. Rom,

How do you become a doctor on an Island? I mean, how do I grow up to be like you?

Thanks!
Jake

[Raven O'Reilly]

Dear Dr. Rom,

Is there such a thing as an overdose in hanging hobbits? I just can't stop myself...

Sincerely,
Dependent in Delaware Valley

[Remus Lupin]

Dear Dr. Rom,

I have a problem with a friend of mine that I don't really like. I want to enjoy my summer holiday, but he keeps calling me EVERYDAY. He called me a few days ago and asked if he could come over and told him that "I'm a little tired." Then he called during the next day and the day after and the day after and... you get the point. I'm running out of excuses! He is a small guy, he is annoying and he enjoys attention and listens to bad music. I want those calls to stop, they're destroying my holiday!

Please help me.

Yours truly,
Remus

[nightskiesfading]

Dear Dr. Rom,

Lately I've had a strange pain inside me when I see or hear anything about certain Hobbits. The pain increased this year, by exponential amounts. Sometimes on Wednesday nights, the pain hurts so much, the only thing I can do is curse loudly. Being a very wise medical doctor I thought you would have experience in dealing with problems such as this.

Best Regards,
A Pained Patient.

[ehsteve]

Thanks Doc, the thing is, i've ran out of otherwater, the supply that came with the EClaire membership package ran out a few weeks ago, in fact, that's when the dreams began, it makes sense now! so can i get a prescription for say a few more litres of the good stuff?

also, ever since the big electromagnetic pulse thing from when desmond did what-ever the hell he did in the hatch, after that sound and light, i've had a terrible ringing in my ears, it's all i can hear, and worse of all, the ringing's to the tune of "you all everybody" all day, it's just da-daaa-da-da-da-daaaaaaaa, da-daaaa-da-da-da-daaaa, it's driving me mad!!! help me!

Scott

[Comet]

Dear Dr. Rom,

So a couple of weeks ago I was buried in some sand, I was trying to scare this blond lass called Claire, and her baby. And all of a sudden there's this really high pitched noise, and this old man called Bernard trods on me. And then to top it off this metal hatch door cracks me on the side of the head.

My question is, how do I treat hatch door related injuries to the head,

Many thanks,
Comet.

[LadyIrina]

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
Due to the amount of questions, the doctor has agreed to put in a little over-time and come to your aid tonight! :D
Once again, give it up for the wonderful Dr Rom!

http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/9532/drromyeah1wd.jpg

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

What is a normal life? I've heard Others talking about it, but I'm not certain what they mean. Can you enlighten me?

Sincerely,
Confused In Carolina

And also, this one is from my son:

Dear Dr. Rom,

How do you become a doctor on an Island? I mean, how do I grow up to be like you?

Thanks!
Jake

http://img383.imageshack.us/img383/581/drromsyringe1st.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Confused In Carolina

I'm afraid the 'normal life' phrase is over-used and over-rated.
As long as you are not abusing nooses, annoying people, suffer from severe stupidity or get in the way of true love, your life should be rated as pretty normal whatever it's contents may be.
Should a normal life bore you however, I strongly recommend joining the Dharma gang. They're guaranteed to change your view on things, and you get to be one of the good guys!
Hope that cleared matters up for you a bit!

Hello there, Jake!
To become an Island physician you need to eat all your vegetables, always do as your mommy tells you, and work really hard at school! I applaud your brilliant choice of a role-model, and feel free to send me a mail should you need someone to recommend you to Other college!
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

Is there such a thing as an overdose in hanging hobbits? I just can't stop myself...

Sincerely,
Dependent in Delaware Valley

http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8410/drromcute6in.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Dependent in Delaware Valley

It is my firm opinion that you can never overdose in hanging hobbits, just be careful that it does not take over your life, or that you get wrongly accused of hangings that no one can prove you did...
Just because you were last seen with the thing does not mean it was your fault! I mean, there's plenty folk around who could have done it, but eeeveryone blames you! Like you did not have your hands full with this glorious Aussie?
What I really mean is... Good luck to you and your hangings.

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

I have a problem with a friend of mine that I don't really like. I want to enjoy my summer holiday, but he keeps calling me EVERYDAY. He called me a few days ago and asked if he could come over and told him that "I'm a little tired." Then he called during the next day and the day after and the day after and... you get the point. I'm running out of excuses! He is a small guy, he is annoying and he enjoys attention and listens to bad music. I want those calls to stop, they're destroying my holiday!

Please help me.

Yours truly,
Remus

http://img95.imageshack.us/img95/8827/drromcontemplating6eo.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Remus

Oh, don't we all have at least one of those annoying little things that just wont take a hint and leave us alone?
On a regular basis, I would recommend a hanging, but this person seems to have gone a bit too far. So heavier actions must be taken.
You might want to Othernap a net, like the ones the Crazy French Chick has, and put up a trap. Once the culprit is trapped, make sure he cannot escape and wait for Fluffy, fire ants or whatever you feel like throwing at him...
Good luck!

Dr Rom.


PS, if that doesn't work, you can always just scream when he calls, then hang up and move to the Island. I think there's an opening as an Island cop.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

Lately I've had a strange pain inside me when I see or hear anything about certain Hobbits. The pain increased this year, by exponential amounts. Sometimes on Wednesday nights, the pain hurts so much, the only thing I can do is curse loudly. Being a very wise medical doctor I thought you would have experience in dealing with problems such as this.

Best Regards,
A Pained Patient.

http://img488.imageshack.us/img488/5248/drromsyringe1lg.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Pained Patient

It pains me to hear about your pains, and it is clearly a condition that must be treated as quick as possible.
During the worst seizures, I recommend a bit of Otherwater, but I also suggest a tiny hobbit doll that you can release the worst of your anger upon. It is very important that you do not let the hobbit ruin your life, or shoot you, but that you have the upper hand. Watching special scenes from your favorite TV show may also have a calming effect.
If worst comes to be, you can always throw papayas at hobbit pictures.
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Thanks Doc, the thing is, i've ran out of otherwater, the supply that came with the EClaire membership package ran out a few weeks ago, in fact, that's when the dreams began, it makes sense now! so can i get a prescription for say a few more litres of the good stuff?

also, ever since the big electromagnetic pulse thing from when desmond did what-ever the hell he did in the hatch, after that sound and light, i've had a terrible ringing in my ears, it's all i can hear, and worse of all, the ringing's to the tune of "you all everybody" all day, it's just da-daaa-da-da-da-daaaaaaaa, da-daaaa-da-da-da-daaaa, it's driving me mad!!! help me!

Scott

http://img488.imageshack.us/img488/243/drromprofile22am.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Scott

Hmm, the EClaire membership package should last for a few months more... Be careful that you do not overdose on the stuff! But a new shipment should arrive in EClaire by morning, so help is on it's way! Hang in there!
As for the side-effects of Des' EMP, I suggest you start singing the Ethan-song until the Otherwater arrives tomorrow. I hear the tune is quite catchy!
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

So a couple of weeks ago I was buried in some sand, I was trying to scare this blond lass called Claire, and her baby. And all of a sudden there's this really high pitched noise, and this old man called Bernard trods on me. And then to top it off this metal hatch door cracks me on the side of the head.

My question is, how do I treat hatch door related injuries to the head,

Many thanks,
Comet.

http://img226.imageshack.us/img226/6050/drromprofile4vw.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Comet

A lot of us Others are considering suing Desmond for sending dangerous hatch debris all over the Island. I even had to treat a fellow Other for a hatch splinter in his eye!
Hatch door related injuries to the head should be treated with papaya juice and Dharma aspirin. Beware of escalating symptoms like hallucinations, for example black smoke moving around, conning people, or the need to cry all the time. If this happens, get medical attention at once!
Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

I have a rather embarassing problem involving an irrational emotional attachment to a hobbit. He really is an oaf to be honest, but I can't help feeling a tad compassionate for him. I even find myself making excuses for his disturbing behaviors. For instance, when he recently attacked an innocent woman I rushed to his defence saying that he was just planning a surprise birthday party for the woman and that bagging and dragging were perfectly respected methods of treating women back in the Shire. Really, I think it's a wretched thing he did but I am powerless against his hobbitish charm and wit.

Dr. Rom, why do I feel the need to defend him and how can I stop?

Sincerely,
Anonymous Hobbit Lover

http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8410/drromcute6in.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Anonymous Hobbit Lover

The power of love is stronger than our intellect, I'm afraid, and we are quite powerless to stop it. It takes courage to try defending your chosen one, despite his bad decisions, and even more courage to admit that you probably shouldn't defend him. The question is, are you ready to keep fighting for him, if he does not change his ways? The sad truth may be that there may be more disappointments in store for you, and you must weigh this against the fun times. If it is worth it, do not let anyone tell you who you should care about! Follow your heart!

Dr Rom.

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg

Ethan...? I mean... Dr Rom? Where are you going?
What?
Following your heart?
Wait... You're not Othernapping Claire again, are you??
Ethan! ETHAN ROM!
...
..
.
Duhr... Well... The doctor will be back soon to answer more of your questions! Leave them here or PM LadyIrina, and Dr Rom's wisdom will reach you!

[AbsolutelyCurtains]

:crackup::crackup:

:bowdown: You truly are a genius. :bowdown:

PS, if that doesn't work, you can always just scream when he calls, then hang up and move to the Island. I think there's an opening as an Island cop

:crackup:!!! That is too funny.....

[ehsteve]

Dr. Rom.

you don't know me, i mean we've never met or anything, but i've got a problem and i need your help with it.
a few weeks ago, i was with the girl i liked,for argument's sake, we'll call her "Hanna-Lucia" we were on a nice relaxing hike, talking eating, you know how it is.... but then i must've said something, and, you know women, she just flipped jumped at me witha big stick and stabbed me right in the chest, i had to pretend to be dead so she wouldn't kill me! she left and i walked off, bu the stick was right into my hest, i can't take it out, and i'm too embarrased to ask fo help, there were even these 2 guys i knew n the jungle "Mr. Geko" and "Pin" i was so embarrased, i just droppedon the round pretending to be dead! I dont know what to do with this big stickin my chest!
Help me Dr Rom

your never-met-before-friend
"Badwin"

[AliCat]

Dear Dr. Rom,

Sorry for the glut of questions, but I just have to know: What is the complete list of uses for Rendered Animal Fat? I've seen it used as glue, and I imagine that it makes for a good head polish... but I've never seen a comprehensive list of uses. I realize this isn't exactly your area of expertise, but I thought I'd ask you anyway.

If you aren't able to answer, could you please pass this question along to the proper person? Thanks so much!

Signed,
Musing Mod

[MasterMinion]

Dear Dr Rom,

I am feeling rather depressed. You see, well ... my pet noose died last week. It was ... unexpected. It drowned in this strange salty wave, it came hurtling his way and ... :bawl:

I couldn't even hear his screams! They were drowned out by this strange sobbing noise, and some one shouting 'But I looove you Kate! I gave yooou Guava seeeds! Doesn't that mean anything?'. It was all very sad and very strange. :(

Please can you explain this strange incident, and recomend where I can buy a new pet noose. I am feeling rather lonely ...

Claudia.

[LadyIrina]

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
Hello again!
After severe hunting, I mean paging, Dr Rom, we've finally managed to secure the doctor for your questions again!
I would also like to take the opportunity to introduce my partner in crime, the lovely and evil Erica, who is going to step in for me if it's needed!
http://img235.imageshack.us/img235/8782/limecat3xo.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Be nice to her, or she will use that noose! :D
Anyway, over to the questions!

http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/9532/drromyeah1wd.jpg

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dr. Rom.

you don't know me, i mean we've never met or anything, but i've got a problem and i need your help with it.
a few weeks ago, i was with the girl i liked,for argument's sake, we'll call her "Hanna-Lucia" we were on a nice relaxing hike, talking eating, you know how it is.... but then i must've said something, and, you know women, she just flipped jumped at me witha big stick and stabbed me right in the chest, i had to pretend to be dead so she wouldn't kill me! she left and i walked off, bu the stick was right into my hest, i can't take it out, and i'm too embarrased to ask fo help, there were even these 2 guys i knew n the jungle "Mr. Geko" and "Pin" i was so embarrased, i just droppedon the round pretending to be dead! I dont know what to do with this big stickin my chest!
Help me Dr Rom

your never-met-before-friend
"Badwin"

http://img95.imageshack.us/img95/8827/drromcontemplating6eo.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Badwin

I can't help but to feel that I know you from somewhere...
Still, luckily for you, a friend of mine had the very same problem! ...Only his name is, uh, Harry, and his girl-friend is called... Mary Sue...
What I'm trying to say here is that we all make fools out of ourselves. It's a fact.
Instead you should focus on getting rid of that stick that is preventing you from having a normal life, and find a way to discuss this with your girl! If she tends to do this all the time, I suggest we set up an appointment for her in the new Dharma Anger Management Classes.
Find someone you can trust, or think you can trust, and ask for their assistance.
Playing dead is not all the fun it's cracked up to be...
Trust me.

Dr Rom.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr. Rom,

Sorry for the glut of questions, but I just have to know: What is the complete list of uses for Rendered Animal Fat? I've seen it used as glue, and I imagine that it makes for a good head polish... but I've never seen a comprehensive list of uses. I realize this isn't exactly your area of expertise, but I thought I'd ask you anyway.

If you aren't able to answer, could you please pass this question along to the proper person? Thanks so much!

Signed,
Musing Mod

http://img488.imageshack.us/img488/243/drromprofile22am.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Musing Mod

What am I here for, if not for your questions? In Dharma, we encourage the need for knowledge!
Rendered Animal Fat has been an Island specialty for a long time, and a complete list would take ages to set up.
Despite me being perfectly able to answer your question, my Other senses tells me that you are secretly hoping to hear from the expert himself, and I like to think of myself as somewhat of a love doctor as well!
I give you; John Locke.

Dr Rom.

http://img164.imageshack.us/img164/1368/locke6te.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Basic Need To Know About RAF (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Industrial_rendering)
Say, a woman interested in RAF? How do you feel about buttons? Hatches?
For the sake of the Island, I think we should sit down together and calmly discuss this.
My place? 8'ish? Formal wear?
I'll distract Jack, and you steal the wine from Sawyer!

John

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/9000/shadow5st.png
Dear Dr Rom,

I am feeling rather depressed. You see, well ... my pet noose died last week. It was ... unexpected. It drowned in this strange salty wave, it came hurtling his way and ...

Please can you explain this strange incident, and recomend where I can buy a new pet noose. I am feeling rather lonely ...

Claudia.

http://img488.imageshack.us/img488/5248/drromsyringe1lg.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Dear Claudia

First of all, let me say that I'm sorry for your loss. It's through these difficult times that we learn how strong we really are and that life goes on no matter what.
As for the salty wave of mystery, it is safe to say that we have scientists working on it as I write and they are puzzled indeed. We've got a lot of mysteries on this Island, but the chemicals found in the samples we collected does not match sea water. Whatever produced this must be found and stopped!
Tips may be phoned in at 555-DHARMA. A five pint of Otherwater is set up as a reward!
A new noose may never replace your old one, but I suggest you take a peek at Dharma Nooses 4 U services, as they have the biggest selection. I'm sure you'll find something you like there! Good luck!

Dr Rom.

http://img473.imageshack.us/img473/879/emu23copycopy7gp.jpg
Yeah, you guessed it; That's it for now!
Remember, there is not a thing Dr Rom does not know!
Keep asking and have fun!

[Remus Lupin]

Dear Dr Rom,

I'm getting new bruises, cuts and gashes everyday. I'm getting tired of getting gashed like this all the time. I want it to stop, because it's really annoying. How can I stop it?

Yours truly,
Remus

[bookworm]

Dr. Rom,
Thank you for the medical advice concerning my vacation without Lost. I did indeed survive my withdrawl, I mean, time away from Lost. As you suspected, I was thinking of smilies, more than would be expected. Having a fellow forum-er on vacation and a spontaneous verbal Lost trivia game on the trip home also helped to ease my pain.
thank you,
bookworm
:D :blank: :p :eek: :rolleyes: :giggle: