The Cult Ship Pillow Fight -- JOKE DEBATE

[AliCat]

Hello there. Are you tired of the Jate/Skate Debate? We know we are; that's why we're happy to present the Claire Lover's Pillow Fight!

Think Ethan is better for Claire? How about Locke? Are you SURE that Sawyer is best for her?

Well, look no further! This thread is for you. Here, you can sling soft insults at your opponent in true EClairian style!

For example, if I felt that Locke was better than Ethan, I might say:

"Hey, EClairians! Ethan's so wimpy he'd beg for mercy from Locke in a pillow fight!"

Or, If I thought Sawyer was better suited as a partner for Claire, I might say: "Hey, Coakers! Your man's so old ONE PILLOW could bring him to his knees!"

Of course, there's always the option that you could toss out totally untrue facts about your opponent.

"Hey, ConMamians? Didn't you know that Sawyer's allergic to kindness?"
"Hey, Coakers! Didn't you know Locke is afraid of turtles?"
"Hey, EClairians! Ethan smells like rendered animal fat!"

See how inconsequential this type of arguing is?

But look how much more fun we'll have than the Skaters and Jaters!

>>>This JOKE DEBATE brought to you by your local chapter of Joke Ship: EClaire<<<

[PITAchic]

Starting off with my lame argument (please keep in mind that I did not sleep at all last night... no really, ask Ali; I've been up all night):

Sawyer is better for Claire than Locke because he has better hair. And we all know Claire can cut hair. I mean really, what is she gonna do for Locke? Wax his head?

[Kind]

She could draw little smiley faces on it.

[PITAchic]

She could draw little smiley faces on it.
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

Okay, ya got me there! :rotflol:

[MasterMinion]

ahem ... ethan is best for claire because ... um, because ... oh - stuff this! *swings pillow round*

GO ECLAIRE!

[illyriaburkle]

Pfft, at least Locke looks good without hair. If Sawyer had no hair he'd look like a hairless chimpangze. :p

[MasterMinion]

Pfft, at least Locke looks good without hair. If Sawyer had no hair he'd look like a hairless chimpangze. :p
LOL! *takes a pillow-coated swing at conmamainians*

[_Erica_]

LMAO Illy :crackup:

Locke- he can make a real peanut butter from ( come on, say it with me) rendered animal fat and we all know it :nod:

Old stuff? OK< how about that --> He beat up Charlie.... they all did that :eh:

[PITAchic]

Pfft, at least Locke looks good without hair. If Sawyer had no hair he'd look like a hairless chimpangze. :p
I think Locke already looks like a monkey (reminds me of curious George, actually; Locke is pretty damn curious about the island, too :nod: ).

And I hate monkeys.

So.... if you would please direct your eyes to my banner....

Southern Sex God, or Old Wrinkly Monkey?

[illyriaburkle]

So.... if you would please direct your eyes to my banner....

Southern Sex God, or Old Wrinkly Monkey?

He's a Wrinkly Southern Monkey. :D

He beat up Charlie.... they all did that

Wow, they did too, go Locke, Ethan and Wrinkly Southern Monkey! :p

[PITAchic]

He's a Wrinkly Southern Monkey. :D
You cheat, that's not what I meant! :p *hits with pillow*

I can pull the old "Aaron likes Sawyer's voice" card. Remember? They had that nice scene? Sawyer calmed Aaron down when nothing else would? Sound familiar? Yes?

I thought so.

[MasterMinion]

Southern Sex God, or Old Wrinkly Monkey?
so it comes to this - name calling... and pillows. but that is always a good way to go about things!

Ethan is best for claire because he knows (and can afford) all the best romantic getaway hotels on this side of the island!

[*Pauly*]

Ethan probably has his own dharma pad on the island without that annoying alarm going off every 108 minutes. He would also make a wonderful lover. Full of energy.

[Mighty_Squid]

Sawyer himself said that Locke was a sensitive man!

Ethan. Pfft.

You know in that deleted scene Locke kicked his *@#& right?

[PITAchic]

Hey, Sawyer had a gun to Ethan's head. Take that, Ethan! *ignores the fact that it was Charlie who actually shot him*

[Ice Berg Legend]

lol - so true PolarBear.

With Ethan she will be sorted for life courtesy of Mr Alvaro and Ethan is a man of suprises, no such thing as a normal day with this wildthing :D

Sawyer will be gone the minute he sees something else he likes and runs out of jokes and nick-names. And you know one day Locke will just pack up and leave one day mumbling something about destiny and go to the hatch and devote his life to crunching the numbers and arguing with Jack - those are his real loves :p

[illyriaburkle]

You cheat, that's not what I meant! :p *hits with pillow*

*cackles and hits back with TWO pillows*

We all know Locke's best for Claire because he gave Charlie a split cheek. Sawyer didn't even bruise the slimey bugger, and all Ethan did was give him a neck rash. :p :rolleyes:

[PITAchic]

*cackles and hits back with TWO pillows*

We all know Locke's best for Claire because he gave Charlie a split cheek. Sawyer didn't even bruise the slimey bugger, and all Ethan did was give him a neck rash. :p :rolleyes:
Um, didn't Sawyer beat Charlie up when he had Claire's diary? At least Sawyer had the decency to not actually read it. But I think we all agree about the dislike of Charlie :p

But hey, with Sawyer, Claire would be well fed. He offered her fish in "Do No Harm." Locke's supposed to be the hunter, and as many people on the island have pointed out, he hasn't caught anything lately (except maybe a rash).

[AliCat]

*sits back and watches the feathers fly* :plotting: *cackles madly*

[illyriaburkle]

Um, didn't Sawyer beat Charlie up when he had Claire's diary? At least Sawyer had the decency to not actually read it. But I think we all agree about the dislike of Charlie :p


Heh, yeah, Sawyer hit Charlie, AND DIDN'T BRUISE HIM!! :p Locke hit him and split his cheek. I think I know who I want protecting my baby. Or in this case, Claires.

[MasterMinion]

aren't we all forgetting the important thing - ethan hung charlie?

[illyriaburkle]

aren't we all forgetting the important thing - ethan hung charlie?

:rolleyes: Yeah, a world of good that did, all Charlie got was a neck rash. Obviously Ethan needs to come back and do the job correctly.

[PITAchic]

Heh, yeah, Sawyer hit Charlie, AND DIDN'T BRUISE HIM!! :p Locke hit him and split his cheek. I think I know who I want protecting my baby. Or in this case, Claires.
I'm sure Sawyer bruised him on the inside, where it really hurts. Besides, it was completely out of character for Locke to punch Charlie.

And besides, how stupid is Locke for trusting Charlie? Repeatedly?

At least Sawyer never trusted him or liked him. Because he knew. From the beginning, he knew....

EDIT:
Yeah, a world of good that did, all Charlie got was a neck rash. Obviously Ethan needs to come back and do the job correctly.
:crackup: ^ That I agree with!

[AliCat]

aren't we all forgetting the important thing - ethan hung charlie?
Actually, technically, we never saw that. Although it is "hanged". Ethan allegedly "hanged" Charlie.

Ethan is also a mighty hunter. And look at the way he beat down Jack! Wow, what a man!

*flings pillows in all directions*

[MasterMinion]

:rolleyes: Yeah, a world of good that did, all Charlie got was a neck rash. Obviously Ethan needs to come back and do the job correctly.
um, he would of DIED if flipping jack and kate hadn't got in the way!

and you gotta admit, you have to have balls to hang a wannabe rock star on drugs!

[illyriaburkle]

I'm sure Sawyer bruised him on the inside, where it really hurts. Besides, it was completely out of character for Locke to punch Charlie.


:crackup: Yeah, Charlie was bruised internally cos Sawyer, who he had a huge pansy crush on, hit him. Hahaha, now that's a scary thought. Poor Sawyer. :p And Locke punching Charlie wasn't out of character, it was out of love. :p

um, he would of DIED if flipping jack and kate hadn't got in the way!

Well they did get in the way, and Charlie only got a neck rash. Ethan has to come back and finish the job! *nudgenudge*

[CutieKitten]

:rolleyes: Yeah, a world of good that did, all Charlie got was a neck rash. Obviously Ethan needs to come back and do the job correctly.
Maybe Ethan has a plan....:plotting:
But Ethan did sort of Traumatise Charlie in a way, no? I mean he didn't talk for ages.
Sawyer did hurt Charlie though, when he hit him, Charlie kept putting his hand on the place where Sawyer had hit him :nod: and Locke's strenght could turn into 'Scary' *holds pillow tight*

[ehsteve]

lol, this is fun!

sawyer punched charlie- got called a ponse
Locke punched charlie- got called a bald w@nker
Ethan hung charlie (probably punched him a few times) - got shot

i think our other man wins, no?

[Ice Berg Legend]

Ethan could have killed Charlie if he wanted to, just ask steve/scott's Ghost :p

Sawyer wouldnt remain faithful to Claire and she's had enough heartbreak already in her life. Aaron needs a proper father figure around, imagine what his first words would be with Sawyer around: "Da..da...dadio" :D

Claire with Locke is better for her well being but to think of it romantically is a little gross. He'll be getting a letter from the Queen by the time Aaron starts shaving :shock: (here in the UK those who live to see 100 years of age get a letter from the Queen :p )

[_Erica_]

But Ethan did sort of Traumatise Charlie in a way, no? I mean he didn't talk for ages.


I just have to ask: did you missed talking Charlie? :p

LMAO, Steve

*grabs a pillow and runs away with it *

[AliCat]

lol, this is fun!

sawyer punched charlie- got called a ponse
Locke punched charlie- got called a bald w@nker
Ethan hung charlie (probably punched him a few times) - got shot

i think our other man wins, no?
I don't know if DYING is the right way to prove your love.

Locke: he brings the girl bananas. He's sensitive. He's not going to con her out of her baby or anything, either!

Have at ye! *parries pillows with King-sized Locke pillow*

[CutieKitten]

I just have to ask: did you missed talking Charlie? :p



Well...maybe..:rolleyes: LOL joking! :p No but you had to notice him not talking, normally he's all :blahblah: or singsingsing :nod:
*throws pillow feathers*

[illyriaburkle]

Claire with Locke is better for her well being but to think of it romantically is a little gross. He'll be getting a letter from the Queen by the time Aaron starts shaving :shock: (here in the UK those who live to see 100 years of age get a letter from the Queen :p )

:eek: He's not that old! *hits with pillow*

I don't know if DYING is the right way to prove your love.

:crackup: Ethan will do anything to prove his love!

Locke: he brings the girl bananas. He's sensitive. He's not going to con her out of her baby or anything, either!

Have at ye! *parries pillows with King-sized Locke pillow*

That's our Locke, he's the Island's Sensitive Man. :p :D

[CutieKitten]

That's our Locke, he's the Island's Sensitive Man. :p :D

Except when Charlie is involved...in that case he turns into super punch locke :p

[illyriaburkle]

Except when Charlie is involved...in that case he turns into super punch locke :p

When Charlie's involved, all three turn nasty. :rolleyes:

[MasterMinion]

ethan rocks because hes an other. end of.

[Ice Berg Legend]

Glad to see no one is fighting in Charlie's corner here :D

He has no redeeming qualities whatsoever

[_Erica_]

When Charlie's involved, all three turn nasty. :rolleyes:

:crackup: :crackup: maybe it's because Charlie himself is nasty? :p

[Kind]

Yeah! Go Charlie! He has super dying-like-a-prat-power!

Seriously, though.

Charlie: I won't let anything happen to you. (gets hung from tree)

I think we all know that Sawyer is impotent on the island, and takes out his frustration by squashing tree frogs.

[AliCat]

Well, Sawyer has all the guns AND knows where Hurley stashes the food... I'd say he *could be* a good provider...

*tosses pillow*

[illyriaburkle]

:crackup: :crackup: maybe it's because Charlie himself is nasty? :p

:rotflol:

I think we all know that Sawyer is impotent on the island, and takes out his frustration by squashing tree frogs.

:crackup:

[Kind]

(dodges pillow in bullet time, hurts back, trips over a grenade into a pit of spikes)

BUT....Ethan has the muscles. He could headbutt Sawyer into oblivion.

Meanwhile Locke gets frisky with Claire.

[Britt]

well sawyer doesn't need viagra unlike locke

this thread is hilarious

[PITAchic]

Meanwhile Locke gets frisky with Claire.
Are there any pills on the island that would help Locke get frisky with Claire? 'Cause otherwise, there may be some issues there :p

[illyriaburkle]

*sniffs* Locke doesn't need Viagra. I'm sure he's just fine. Unlike Sawyer the Wrinkly Southern Monkey who needs Hair Growth tablets.

[Ice Berg Legend]

Sawyer and Locke know of the heroin so lack of Viagra wont be problem :D

[PITAchic]

*sniffs* Locke doesn't need Viagra. I'm sure he's just fine. Unlike Sawyer the Wrinkly Southern Monkey who needs Hair Growth tablets.
I think you meant to say "Locke" right there ^ :nod:

[Kind]

Are there any pills on the island that would help Locke get frisky with Claire? 'Cause otherwise, there may be some issues there :p

Oooooooooh! :p

The monster would help him out with that. That thing can do anything.

And Sawyer would probably be too busy having a distance-pissing competition with Jack to see whose manlier to even think about Claire.

This thread is hilarious.

[CutieKitten]

*sniffs* Locke doesn't need Viagra. I'm sure he's just fine. Unlike Sawyer the Wrinkly Southern Monkey who needs Hair Growth tablets.
:rotflol:
Sawyer? Wrinkly? Have you seen Meggles sig and avi? All that sawyer has is Hot, Sweaty Muscles :nod: Sweaty Sawyer...
As for the tree frog...Sawyer just felt that the tree frog was too much of a 'competition' for him..R.I.P froggy
This thread is super hilarious :rotflol:

[Ice Berg Legend]

Claire obviously isnt a shallow girl who only finds the looks of a man attractive....after all she was with the hobbit for quite a while :D

*ducks the multiple pillows thrown by PB&Jers in Neo Matrix style*

[illyriaburkle]

I think you meant to say "Locke" right there ^ :nod:

*sniffs again* Hmm, no, I meant Sawyer. *mock!glare* We all know that hair is fake. :p

And off I go. I'll be around later, all you Coaker's better take my place. ;)

[_Erica_]

Are there any pills on the island that would help Locke get frisky with Claire? 'Cause otherwise, there may be some issues there :p

:crackup: I suggest checking Hurley's stash :nod:

[PITAchic]

:rotflol:
Sawyer? Wrinkly? Have you seen Meggles sig and avi? All that sawyer has is Hot, Sweaty Muscles :nod: Sweaty Sawyer...
As for the tree frog...Sawyer just felt that the tree frog was too much of a 'competition' for him..R.I.P froggy
This thread is super hilarious :rotflol:
Thanks, Bert. That's what I was trying to say!

AND... we over in ConMama already determined why Sawyer killed the frog. See, frogs croak and make lots of noise, and he didn't want it to wake up baby Aaron. So he was doing it out of his love for Claire. I don't see Locke doing that for her or Aaron!

[Kind]

Sawyer is a prostitute. It had to be said.

Maybe Ethan, Locke and Sawyer can fuse into the perfect man for Claire....Sackhan.

[_Erica_]

frogs croak and make lots of noise, and he didn't want it to wake up baby Aaron. So he was doing it out of his love for Claire. I don't see Locke doing that for her or Aaron!

Hello! *waves flag* Ethan did shut up the wannabe :p As Bert noticed earlier, for a quiet long period of time! Did Locke do that,huh ?

[PITAchic]

Sawyer is a prostitute. It had to be said.

Maybe Ethan, Locke and Sawyer can fuse into the perfect man for Claire....Sackhan.
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

Oh yes, we can combine all the best parts; Sawyer's looks, Locke's skills, and Ethan's..... ability to hang the hobbit?

[Ice Berg Legend]

Maybe Ethan, Locke and Sawyer can fuse into the perfect man for Claire....Sackhan.
...or an online attorney: E-Lawyer :eek:

[CutieKitten]

Thanks, Bert. That's what I was trying to say!

AND... we over in ConMama already determined why Sawyer killed the frog. See, frogs croak and make lots of noise, and he didn't want it to wake up baby Aaron. So he was doing it out of his love for Claire. I don't see Locke doing that for her or Aaron!

Welcome Meggles *high five* :p
:nod: All that locke really cares , about aaron, is so that he can prove that he can make diapers out of wool and loads of baby gadgets! *throws pillow*
*whispers* locke has a business plan.:p

[Kind]

:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

Oh yes, we can combine all the best parts; Sawyer's looks, Locke's skills, and Ethan's..... ability to hang the hobbit?

Combining the clothes of Ethan, the skin of Sawyer, and the eyes of Locke, to make a freakish hybrid that can only say its name.

And Ethan could easily beat the crap out of Sawyer with a massive hobbit arm torn from the corpse of Charlie.

[PITAchic]

And Ethan could easily beat the crap out of Sawyer with a massive hobbit arm torn from the corpse of Charlie.
But don't forget, Sawyer has all the guns now, so he can shoot Ethan (more than 5 or 6 times as Charlie did) and kill the guy for real. Just aim for the head; isn't that how you kill zombies?

[AliCat]

Combining the clothes of Ethan, the skin of Sawyer, and the eyes of Locke, to make a freakish hybrid that can only say its name.

And Ethan could easily beat the crap out of Sawyer with a massive hobbit arm torn from the corpse of Charlie.
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

*tosses pillows in ALL directions, even one towards Maire and Jaire*

:rotflol: :crackup: :rotflol:

Continue. *ahem*

[Kind]

Ethan and Locke will team up, and lead an army of tree frogs against Sawyer.

[CutieKitten]

Ethan and Locke will team up, and lead an army of tree frogs against Sawyer.

:crackup: :crackup: Revenge of the tree frogs :crackup:

[PITAchic]

Ethan and Locke will team up, and lead an army of tree frogs against Sawyer.
Well, we all know how easily Sawyer takes care of frogs. And I think then would be the perfect time for Locke's legs to short out again (remember that? Mr. "I can't walk, so you must climb the cliff, Boone, and ultimately DIE")

[Mighty_Squid]

Can I just point out that Locke is a walking miracle?

The island gave him back the use of everything below the waist.

Look what he's doing with those legs?

Running, jumping, and saving people all over the place.

What else did the island do?

Yeah.

You know it.

Claire is one lucky girl, I tell you.

[Kind]

Can I just point out that Locke is a walking miracle?

The island gave him back the use of everything below the waist.

Look what he's doing with those legs?

Running, jumping, and saving people all over the place.

What else did the island do?

Yeah.

You know it.

Claire is one lucky girl, I tell you.

YES, THANK YOU!

I knew it.

[PITAchic]

Can I just point out that Locke is a walking miracle?

The island gave him back the use of everything below the waist.

Look what he's doing with those legs?

Running, jumping, and saving people all over the place.

What else did the island do?

Yeah.

You know it.

Claire is one lucky girl, I tell you.
*snickers*

Like I said, he's shorted out before. Wouldn't that just suck for Claire if he shorted out at the wrong moment. Oh yes, lucky girl :rolleyes:

Now Sawyer? I bet that man can go for HOURS!

[AliCat]

Can I just point out that Locke is a walking miracle?

The island gave him back the use of everything below the waist.

Look what he's doing with those legs?

Running, jumping, and saving people all over the place.

What else did the island do?

Yeah.

You know it.

Claire is one lucky girl, I tell you.
*high-fives Squiddy*

Sawyer can't even walk right NOW! He's got that "been around the block with too many prostitutes" walk... looks like he has hemorrhoids.

If *I* were Claire, I sure wouldn't want a man with CONFIRMED STD's in MY bed. *humph*

*aims wickedly sharp pillow at Meggles*

[Kind]

*snickers*

Like I said, he's shorted out before. Wouldn't that just suck for Claire if he shorted out at the wrong moment. Oh yes, lucky girl :rolleyes:

Now Sawyer? I bet that man can go for HOURS!

He takes his shirt off too much. He grows his hair too long. He's over-compensating, I tell you.

[_Erica_]

*raises hand*
Why nobody said that Jack would be perfect man for Claire? huh? I mean it- he could start crying competition with Aaron, what will cause Aaron cracking up ( like that: :crackup: ) Come on, what an entertainment value.
And Jack ir a doctor :nod:

*tosses pillows at everyone*

[CutieKitten]

(remember that? Mr. "I can't walk, so you must climb the cliff, Boone, and ultimately DIE")
:( *cries over pillow* R.I.P Boone.
Mr Locke has lots of skeletons in his closet, he knew about Charlies addiction back in season one (he didn't tell claire), in season two he kept the virgin mary statues and he is also keeping a lot of things to himself lately...:plotting: :p
..Hot sweaty guy, Hobbit addict, other man, mr clean...those are the choices for claire...:p
EDIT: LOL, eri :rotflol: and she can also choose Doctor Fix it

[Ice Berg Legend]

Well Ethan can't take his shirt off, he has to give Sawyer and Locke some hope :D

[AliCat]

*raises hand*
Why nobody said that Jack would be perfect man for Claire? huh? I mean it- he could start crying competition with Aaron, what will cause Aaron cracking up ( like that: :crackup: ) Come on, what an entertainment value.
And Jack ir a doctor :nod:

*tosses pillows at everyone*
Who invited JACK in here, huh?

booooooooo!

[PITAchic]

Okay, but with Sawyer, there's no chance of the writers pulling a "he's your biological father" card. Come on now, Locke's definitely old enough.... you never know what can come out of the woodwork on Mystery Frickin' Island.

[Ice Berg Legend]

Claire can't handle TWO cry babies now can she

[_Erica_]

Claire can't handle TWO cry babies now can she

:rotflol: but crying lil Jacko will only make Aaron laugh, not cry :p

Hey Aliii *sounds of flying pillow*

[AliCat]

:rotflol: but crying lil Jacko will only make Aaron laugh, not cry :p

Hey Aliii *sounds of flying pillow*
*ducks dozens of pillows, roundhouse kicks pillows Chuck Norris style back at Erica*

[Mighty_Squid]

*throws pillows ninja style*

Sawyer offered Claire fish, what? ONCE!?!?!

That ain't no relationship.

Ethan tried to HELP her and all he got was four in the chest.

Some people.

(Wait a minute. What side am I on again?)

[Ice Berg Legend]

had to drop Chuck Norris in somehow didnt you Ali :D

LOL - welcome to the dark...I mean misunderstood side Squid

[AliCat]

*throws pillows ninja style*

Sawyer offered Claire fish, what? ONCE!?!?!

That ain't no relationship.

Ethan tried to HELP her and all he got was four in the chest.

Some people.

(Wait a minute. What side am I on again?)
Doesn't really matter, Squiddy. Just throw some insults and pillows, it's all good.

I'm a ConMamian, Coaker, and The Mother of EClaire; I'll toss the darn things anywhere I want!

Have at ye, Coaker! *tosses pillow at the Locke Idol*

[PITAchic]

*throws pillows ninja style*

Sawyer offered Claire fish, what? ONCE!?!?!

That ain't no relationship.

Ethan tried to HELP her and all he got was four in the chest.

Some people.

(Wait a minute. What side am I on again?)
How many times had Locke offered Claire food? Even Charlie went that far! She'd starve to death if she was with Locke!

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y161/ProudLostaway/d72f35c0.gif

[_Erica_]

*ducks dozens of pillows, roundhouse kicks pillows Chuck Norris style back at Erica*

*catches all the pillows on a lasso Other-style* *laughs evilly*

Don't forget that only Ethan invited Claire for a romantic dinner :rolleyes:

[Kind]

Yeah, well, well, well, Claire and Sawyer are both blond, it would look dumb! (tries to throw pillow, trips and knocks self out)

.....

[PITAchic]

Yeah, well, well, well, Claire and Sawyer are both blond, it would look dumb! (tries to throw pillow, trips and knocks self out)

.....
That just means they'd have beautiful, blonde haired babies.

[nightskiesfading]

*joins in the fight by tossing a small pillow *


Yeah, well, well, well, Claire and Sawyer are both blond, it would look dumb! (tries to throw pillow, trips and knocks self out)

.....
Well Locke's bald so that works perfectly :p

[CutieKitten]

*throws pillows ninja style*

Sawyer offered Claire fish, what? ONCE!?!?!

That ain't no relationship.

Ethan tried to HELP her and all he got was four in the chest.

Some people.

(Wait a minute. What side am I on again?)
Lol, mixed sides :p
Yes, but what did Locke do?...he made her a cot in season one, then after that, they hardly spoke to eachother...Sawyer gave her a fish, someones photo album/wedding plans and he likes reading to aaron. Ethan even kidnapped her because he was so desperate, All locke did was punch charlie...which would have been a BIG thing..but Ethan hanged him..now that's some competition :nod: :p

[AliCat]

Lol, mixed sides :p
Yes, but what did Locke do?...he made her a cot in season one, then after that, they hardly spoke to eachother...Sawyer gave her a fish, someones photo album/wedding plans and he likes reading to aaron. Ethan even kidnapped her because he was so desperate, All locke did was punch charlie...which would have been a BIG thing..but Ethan hanged him..now that's some competition :nod: :p
I feel the need to point out that Sawyer did NOT, in fact, ENJOY reading to Aaron. :mad: He read because of that ridiculous hobbit, who couldn't even figure out that he had a NEWBORN in direct sunlight! Cancer, people! Babies DIE from sunburn! *kicks pillow at hanging Charlie pinata*

[PITAchic]

I feel the need to point out that Sawyer did NOT, in fact, ENJOY reading to Aaron. :mad: He read because of that ridiculous hobbit, who couldn't even figure out that he had a NEWBORN in direct sunlight! Cancer, people! Babies DIE from sunburn! *kicks pillow at hanging Charlie pinata*
But when has Sawyer ever done anything he didn't want to do? Nobody forced him, no one had a gun to his head. He still did it, because he's a nice guy at heart! :lotsalove

[nightskiesfading]

Locke punching charlie was doing EVERYONE a favor.

Locke has helped her with the baby too! Sawyer read to him that one day, Locke made him a crip and taught Claire had to wrap him up all nicely

*whips you all in the head with a pillow*

[Ice Berg Legend]

Don't worry Ali, no one is trying to protect Charlie here. In fact all our protagonists played a part in inflicting some form of pain on the hapless hobbit. No less than he deserves.

[CutieKitten]

I feel the need to point out that Sawyer did NOT, in fact, ENJOY reading to Aaron. :mad: He read because of that ridiculous hobbit, who couldn't even figure out that he had a NEWBORN in direct sunlight! Cancer, people! Babies DIE from sunburn! *kicks pillow at hanging Charlie pinata*

But he still read to Aaron :nod:
Yes the hobbit is a very stupid-nogood-puncher-hobbit , we should call up ethan..ask him a few..err..favours :plotting: *balances pillow on head*

[_Erica_]

*thinks*

Jin! Ha :p Sawyer offered Claire fish, ok. But did he catch it? Nope, it was all Jin :nod: and he was with Claire when Aaron was born.
AND I bet that he would love reading to Aaron, if he only knew English :rotflol:

*snatches Bert's pillow and tosses it at ConMamaians*

[nightskiesfading]

Claire and Jin?! Clin?! There's a unique ship. Plus Jin felt the baby kicking :nod:

But it's all Locke for Claire ;) Locke could tell Aaron secrets of the island and read Dharma initiative handbooks to him

[CutieKitten]

Locke could tell Aaron secrets of the island and read Dharma initiative handbooks to him
and he could also tie him up and make him watch the orientation video for about 10 times then put him in a 48 hour shift in the hatch to press the numbers...
Aaron needs someone who can give him education..wheres artz when you need him? :no:
*Gets spare pillows from Conmama and places on head*

[_Erica_]

Aaron needs someone who can give him education..wheres artz when you need him? :no:


:crackup: a-little-bit-every-where :rotflol:

*dances tango with EClaire pillow*

[CutieKitten]

:crackup:
Well at least aaron can smell him..or err..create a puzzle or something, Locke makes good glue...:plotting:

[nightskiesfading]

Arts and crafts with Mommy :crackup: Using Locke's crazy glue and peices of Artz and putting them back together again, maybe he can peice together Charlie's dignity while he's at it?

[AliCat]

:crackup:
Well at least aaron can smell him..or err..create a puzzle or something, Locke makes good glue...:plotting:
SEE! There's ANOTHER thing Locke could do for Aaron and Claire! He could help put together the Arzt puzzle!

Have at ye, you scoundrel! *throws pillow at Bert*

[_Erica_]

:crackup:
Well at least aaron can smell him..or err..create a puzzle or something, Locke makes good glue...:plotting:

and Jack is good at fixing things :nod:

[AliCat]

and Jack is good at fixing things :nod:
*groan* NOT Jack again!

*dumps mattress on Eri to shut her up*

[Ice Berg Legend]

Very good point, with Locke's rendered animal fat the guy can virtually make anything so Claire and Aaron can have anything they wish :D

[CutieKitten]

*catches pillow, Kung Fu hustle style* Well...Locke could be the creative guy, but he does have a lot of knives.. one night he'll be sleeping and aaron will be just crawling around and end up hurting himself :( :no:
artz should flow round and give aaron some lessons, about science and explosions..why things explode...

[Raven O'Reilly]

Yea, but Jack can't make a pillow out of rendered animal fat. :p

[nightskiesfading]

Yep Locke is perfect for Claire. No matter what Claire needs, Locke can make it. Sure, when there's a hatch in the ground that needs opening, he might dissapear for a bit. But that would be giving Claire some space, which is important in every relationship

*picks up pillow and sits on it*

[_Erica_]

*groan* NOT Jack again!

*dumps mattress on Eri to shut her up*

:raspberry Ain't that easy to shut ME up

Jack was the first man Claire met on the island :nod:

*other-naps Ali's dust bunnies* Muhahaha now I have hostages :p

[Ice Berg Legend]

Yea, but Jack can't make a pillow out of rendered animal fat. :p
yes he could, it'll just be a very lumpy and slimey pillow that Aaron might end up eating piece by piece :eek:

[CutieKitten]

Ethan could make aaron a proper pillow though, since he's used to jungle life :nod:

[nightskiesfading]

Yep he could form one from tree bark and leaves, Claire has a lot of options!

Charlie, however, could only provide a lame jar of peanut butter, AFTER begging Hurley and Locke for it. He could always provide imaginary things for Claire though :rolleyes:

[AliCat]

Well, imagination is an important part of any relationship... Like imagining that Charlie is an option. :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

Ahem. *nonchalantly flings pillow in the general direction of ConMama.*

[_Erica_]

Just imagine --> imaginary Charlie :crackup:

*Grabs one pillow, hides under the couch with it and falls asleep*

[NikaChan]

Ooooh, this is a great idea, and I love pillow fights as well. :D

[AliCat]

Just imagine --> imaginary Charlie :crackup:

*Grabs one pillow, hides under the couch with it and falls asleep*
Awww, she looks so sweet and innocent and harmless when she's sleeping... :crackup:

*steals back dust bunnies*

The reason Ethan is so good at stealth jungle maneuvers is that he is half orangataun, on his father's side.

En garde, EClaire! *brandishes two pillows*

[NikaChan]

The reason Ethan is so good at stealth jungle maneuvers is that he is half orangataun, on his father's side.


:crackup:

[AliCat]

:crackup:
Nika. That's HARDLY pillow throwing. Calm down and toss an insult like the rest of us.

Locke will NEVER get Claire, wanna know why? Because his followers are weak, spineless little sea-creatures! Like Squiddy! *note, I am ALSO a Locke follower, I am throwing pillows at MYSELF as an example*

*Hurls pillow towards silent, ineffectual Coakers*

[illyriaburkle]

Can I just point out that Locke is a walking miracle?

The island gave him back the use of everything below the waist.

Look what he's doing with those legs?

Running, jumping, and saving people all over the place.

What else did the island do?

Yeah.

You know it.

Claire is one lucky girl, I tell you.

:crackup::crackup:

Sawyer can't even walk right NOW! He's got that "been around the block with too many prostitutes" walk... looks like he has hemorrhoids.

If *I* were Claire, I sure wouldn't want a man with CONFIRMED STD's in MY bed. *humph*

:rotflol: I agree completely! :crackup:


Anyway, I have now decided to sit on the fence, I love all these ships too much, it's true. :o

EDIT: I revoke that, screw Ali. *tosses a huge ass pillow at Ali* :mad:

[NikaChan]

Nika. That's HARDLY pillow throwing. Calm down and toss an insult like the rest of us.


I can't throw a pillow if I'm laughing too much!

[Raven O'Reilly]

Nika. That's HARDLY pillow throwing. Calm down and toss an insult like the rest of us.

Locke will NEVER get Claire, wanna know why? Because his followers are weak, spineless little sea-creatures! Like Squiddy! *note, I am ALSO a Locke follower, I am throwing pillows at MYSELF as an example*

*Hurls pillow towards silent, ineffectual Coakers*


See folks? This is why EClaire is not only a joke ship, but a sinking ship because Ethan is a psycho-maniac... much like his followers.

Jump off the boat while you still can or you'll be visiting Davey Jones' locker soon!

(At least spineless little sea-creatures can breathe underwater, unlike the rats on a sinking ship!)

:D

[AliCat]

See folks? This is why EClaire is not only a joke ship, but a sinking ship because Ethan is a psycho-maniac... much like his followers.

Jump off the boat while you still can or you'll be visiting Davey Jones' locker soon!

(At least spineless little sea-creatures can breathe underwater, unlike the rats on a sinking ship!)

:D
*GASP* :eek: No she di'int! Girl, you're gonna pay for THAT!

At least Ethan isn't headed for the geriatric ward TOMORROW. He's got mad skills, killer instincts, and he isn't afraid to go for what he wants! IF ONLY Locke was as COOL as Ethan, maybe Claire would've gone off on a jungle-love trek with HIM, too!

*hurls massive, Ethan-shaped pillow at Raven AND Illy!*

[Mighty_Squid]

Hey!:mad:

I can't help being an invertebrate!

[AliCat]

Hey!:mad:

I can't help being an invertebrate!
*hugs Squiddy... but then Squiddy slips through her fingers to plop on the floor, glaring up with her beady little eyes*

Don't get ink on the pillows, please, Squiddy. These are very good, feather stuffed pillows. High-end pillows are best for Cult Ships Pillow Fights. :p

[Raven O'Reilly]

*GASP* :eek: No she di'int! Girl, you're gonna pay for THAT!

At least Ethan isn't headed for the geriatric ward TOMORROW. He's got mad skills, killer instincts, and he isn't afraid to go for what he wants! IF ONLY Locke was as COOL as Ethan, maybe Claire would've gone off on a jungle-love trek with HIM, too!

*hurls massive, Ethan-shaped pillow at Raven AND Illy!*

*Stabs the pillow with her pirate sword.*

Yar, lassie, all Locke had to do was give Claire a smile and she was his. Locke didn't have to jungle-nap her NOR did he jungle-nap the smack sniffin' Charlie! Guess Claire wasn't high enough for him. :p

[NikaChan]

At least Ethan isn't headed for the geriatric ward TOMORROW. He's got mad skills, killer instincts, and he isn't afraid to go for what he wants! IF ONLY Locke was as COOL as Ethan, maybe Claire would've gone off on a jungle-love trek with HIM, too!


Well better to be with someone in the geriatric ward than buried in the ground. I doubt Claire would want to indulge herself in some necrophilia-lovin'. *shudders*

[AliCat]

Well better to be with someone in the geriatric ward than buried in the ground. I doubt Claire would want to indulge herself in some necrophilia-lovin'. *shudders*
Girl, that's nasty.

And as ANY EClairian could tell you, Ethan is well and truly alive. We have proof. Go read "The Tribulations of Ethan Rom."

Can't we all just agree to disagree... and maybe assault Sawyer for a while? No one is here to defend HIM.

[NikaChan]

Yeah, I know, that's why I said it. :p

Poor Sawyer, he has no chance. I don't think he had a chance to begin with.

[Raven O'Reilly]

Dude, Locke saw the Eye of the Island... and it was beautiful. He's so in tune, that he can call up these guys to take out Ethan and his goons (i.e. EClairians):

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d126/ravenslost/penguin.gif

CLEARLY anyone who can captain a bunch of piratical penguins is the one for Claire. It says so in her diary and we *liberated* it from Charlie. :D

[nightskiesfading]

*just sits on a pillow and watches everyone else fight*

Sawyer has weird "steamrolled hairy potter glasses" and a few STD's. No thank you. As hot as he might look, i'll pass on the Syph ;)

[NikaChan]

Raven, where did you get that from? Hahahaha!


Sawyer can't be trusted. He'll probably con Claire into going back to Charlie and we all will be back at square one. For the love of all EClairians and Coakers, we should really keep Claire away from Sawyer at all cost. :D

[Mighty_Squid]

Coake - Can't beat the real thing

Sawyer had work done.

It's obvious.

[AliCat]

Coake - Can't beat the real thing

Sawyer had work done.

It's obvious.
What do you mean by THAT? Sawyer is the island sex god, and we all know it. So what if he has a few outbreaks every once in a while...

[Adelheid]

You guys are so wrapped in your EClaire and Coake and ConMama that you don't even realize that Jack could kill all those wimpy guys with one pillow for protection of Claire!

[NikaChan]

What do you mean by THAT? Sawyer is the island sex god, and we all know it. So what if he has a few outbreaks every once in a while...



I have to disagree, give me Sayid over Sawyer any day.

[Raven O'Reilly]

You guys are so wrapped in your EClaire and Coake and ConMama that you don't even realize that Jack could kill all those wimpy guys with one pillow for protection of Claire!

Oh yea? Well...

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d126/ravenslost/ethanbase.gif

[AliCat]

You guys are so wrapped in your EClaire and Coake and ConMama that you don't even realize that Jack could kill all those wimpy guys with one pillow for protection of Claire!
*JACK?* You have GOT to be kidding me!

*tosses pile of pillows over Heidi and her Jairian followers*

[Ice Berg Legend]

hahaha, those penguins are hilarious Raven!!

but all you have to do is walk away from those penguins and they wont be able to catch up no matter how hard they work those little legs of theirs. Ethan will eat them up in seconds and spit out the bones on Lockes corpse. Locke just being shot by Sawyer after he foolishly allowed himself to be fooled by the known con-man...seriously, what a dumbass Locke was to listen to and trust Sawyer.

[nightskiesfading]

Jack? psshhh. Claire needs a man to take care of her and her baby, not a man who cries more than her baby does!

*gets out pillow bazooka gun*

[Raven O'Reilly]

Jack? psshhh. Claire needs a man to take care of her and her baby, not a man who cries more than her baby does!

*gets out pillow bazooka gun*

LMAO Zing!

[Mighty_Squid]

hahaha, those penguins are hilarious Raven!!

but all you have to do is walk away from those penguins and they wont be able to catch up no matter how hard they work those little legs of theirs. Ethan will eat them up in seconds and spit out the bones on Lockes corpse.

These are special evil dharma penguins.

Trust the squid.

[Ice Berg Legend]

Dharma penguins eh?

Does that mean Ethan will be poisoned if he eats them? maybe he could cook a delightful dish for Sawyer and Locke as a peace offering.

[NikaChan]

Please, Locke only prefers boar, no way would he eat a tainted penguin.

[Ice Berg Legend]

Locke doesnt have to know that it's tainted penguin that he's eating. Ethan is such a skilled chef he can make anything taste like, well, anything.

[AliCat]

Locke doesnt have to know that it's tainted penguin that he's eating. Ethan is such a skilled chef he can make anything taste like, well, anything.
*sings Tainted Love, EClaire theme song, while hurling pillows across the stadium at Coakers and ConMamians... forgetting for a while that she is ALSO on their side (occasionally)*

[NikaChan]

Locke doesnt have to know that it's tainted penguin that he's eating. Ethan is such a skilled chef he can make anything taste like, well, anything.

He should go on Iron Chef then, that would be pretty funny to watch. :p

[AliCat]

He should go on Iron Chef then, that would be pretty funny to watch. :p
Oh.

I seem to feel another challenge coming on... Manips, anyone? :plotting:


"Dude, I have no idea what you're saying, but your FACE is cracking me UP."

[capnlou]

You are all forgetting that it was statisically proven that Sawyer and Claire would have the cutest baby. I can't see Locke being at very good father at his age, the baby would be likely to get stabbed by one of Lockes 400 knives while playing. Ethan of course would be too busy other napping people and hanging Charlie.

Claire needs to be with Sawyer, for Aaron's sake, Aaron needs a sibling and a father who will teach him the important skills of life, like conning people for your own advantage.

*raises pillow threateningly*

[PITAchic]

You are all forgetting that it was statisically proven that Sawyer and Claire would have the cutest baby. I can't see Locke being at very good father at his age, the baby would be likely to get stabbed by one of Lockes 400 knives while playing. Ethan of course would be too busy other napping people and hanging Charlie.

Claire needs to be with Sawyer, for Aaron's sake, Aaron needs a sibling and a father who will teach him the important skills of life, like conning people for your own advantage.

*raises pillow threateningly*
^:nod: :nod: :nod: I agree with everything she just said!!! :D (GO LOU! :boogie: )

[NikaChan]

You are all forgetting that it was statisically proven that Sawyer and Claire would have the cutest baby. I can't see Locke being at very good father at his age, the baby would be likely to get stabbed by one of Lockes 400 knives while playing. Ethan of course would be too busy other napping people and hanging Charlie.


Hey, ya'll forget that Locke made Claire that cradle, no one else was about to do that. I didn't see Sawyer making Claire a place for the baby to sleep. If it was up to him, he would probably let Aaron sleep on the ground. Sawyer has no patience and probably has no patience for kids either, he can't stand it when Aaron cries or when he is around.

Locke on the other hand has shown Claire some ways to help keep Aaron quieted down and has provided her with food to eat. Unlike Charlie and his imaginary jar of crap and Sawyer who is such a miser and won't let anyone near his things. :mad:

[PITAchic]

Hey, ya'll forget that Locke made Claire that cradle, no one else was about to do that. I didn't see Sawyer making Claire a place for the baby to sleep. If it was up to him, he would probably let Aaron sleep on the ground. Sawyer has no patience and probably has no patience for kids either, he can't stand it when Aaron cries or when he is around.

Locke on the other hand has shown Claire some ways to help keep Aaron quieted down and has provided her with food to eat. Unlike Charlie and his imaginary jar of crap and Sawyer who is such a miser and won't let anyone near his things. :mad:
First off, Locke may have made Aaron a cradle, but I'm waiting for the recall on his rendered animal-fat glue and for the thing to fall apart on the poor kid. Sawyer, on the other hand, probably has a nice crib for Aaron in his stash.

And I have never seen Locke feed Claire.... was there really a scene that I missed (haven't seen "One of Them" yet), or are you all just delusional? Sawyer offered Claire his fish, and though Jin may have caught it, I didn't see him or Michael offering her any in that scene. Sawyer could provide for her from his stash, and probably has all the real peanut butter she could ever want. :raspberry

[NikaChan]

And I have never seen Locke feed Claire.... was there really a scene that I missed (haven't seen "One of Them" yet), or are you all just delusional?

Yes, he brought her a batch of bananas, you have to look closely in the background.


Sawyer could provide for her from his stash, and probably has all the real peanut butter she could ever want

Please, the peanut butter was just a pregnancy craving. It's passed, she doesn't need peanut butter anymore. :rolleyes:

[PITAchic]

Yes, he brought her a batch of bananas, you have to look closely in the background.

Please, the peanut butter was just a pregnancy craving. It's passed, she doesn't need peanut butter anymore. :rolleyes:
Oh, well, him bringing her bananas in the background is not the same as a full on scene of him offering her food ;)

And you're right, forget peanut butter and forget Charlie! :p

[the filthy scene]

Locke is cute but he doesn't have the proper sexual prowess at his age, plus i don't think even Locke fans like the squinty wrinkly face he makes when the camera pans around him, not to mention Claire, and that happens a lot. He has so many responsibilities that he would never see Claire or Aaron, then become a horrible alcoholic because the island is angry at him for not spending enough time with it, not to mention everyone getting upset seeing as he is 'the great hunter'. no Claire we don't want our mighty hunter to get lost in the woods getting you some water.


Ethan is cool, but who has time for a woman and a baby whilst people napping and being dead? not to mention he has to spend so many hours beating the sh*t out of Jack (and sometimes this just needs to be done), and hanging VH1 rejects. Plus, this would be a very volatile relationship:

Claire: You're never here for your family!
Ethan: I'm dead!
Claire: You never notice my hair, or my clothes, or anything I do!
Ethan: *hangs Claire* What now bitch??

Sawyer is definitely the man for Claire, he is a sex god, Aaron loves him, they both have accents, they're both blonde, they would have the most attrctive children, they would nicely balance eachother out, he's got a cute ass, she's got a great body, he would let her be independant but still protect her, and no one's going to beleive a pregant lady or someone as cute as Claire is lying in the middle of a con. They're perfect, and if ou don't beleive me......I'll eat you alive. Like chicken. In an Apple Normandy Sauce.

*THWACK*

[capnlou]

Claire likes peanut butter...
Sawyers skin looks kinda like peanut butter...
Claire wants to eat Sawyer...
Sawyer won't object.

And that's why Claire should be with Sawyer.

Meggles- your doing very well holding up the conmamian argument, thought you might need some extra support.:)

[PITAchic]

Locke is cute but he doesn't have the proper sexual prowess at his age, plus i don't think even Locke fans like the squinty wrinkly face he makes when the camera pans around him, not to mention Claire, and that happens a lot. He has so many responsibilities that he would never see Claire or Aaron, then become a horrible alcoholic because the island is angry at him for not spending enough time with it, not to mention everyone getting upset seeing as he is 'the great hunter'. no Claire we don't want our mighty hunter to get lost in the woods getting you some water.


Ethan is cool, but who has time for a woman and a baby whilst people napping and being dead? not to mention he has to spend so many hours beating the sh*t out of Jack (and sometimes this just needs to be done), and hanging VH1 rejects. Plus, this would be a very volatile relationship:

Claire: You're never here for your family!
Ethan: I'm dead!
Claire: You never notice my hair, or my clothes, or anything I do!
Ethan: *hangs Claire* What now bitch??

Sawyer is definitely the man for Claire, he is a sex god, Aaron loves him, they both have accents, they're both blonde, they would have the most attrctive children, they would nicely balance eachother out, he's got a cute ass, she's got a great body, he would let her be independant but still protect her, and no one's going to beleive a pregant lady or someone as cute as Claire is lying in the middle of a con. They're perfect, and if ou don't beleive me......I'll eat you alive. Like chicken. In an Apple Normandy Sauce.

*THWACK*
:clap: :bowdown: :clap: :bowdown: :clap: :bowdown:

Vanessa, you have such a lovely way with words :D

EDIT: Thanks for all your help, Lou! I was dying this morning, being the only ConMamian in here (besides Ali who switched around constantly :p )

[the filthy scene]

thanks meggles :hug:

capnlou, see, that's another reason why conmama is best, it's members are crafty, we think of things only perverts would and we sound damn good saying them.

[capnlou]

Vannessa, that was awesome!

The Conmamians have arrived.

[PITAchic]

The Conmamians have arrived.
Yes they have! GAME ON! :D

[capnlou]

Sawyer is a complicated guy, roughly translate that to interesting guy, and you have another reason why Claire should be with Sawyer. He's a puzzle, life could not get boring when you're trying to figure out what the hell Sawyer is on about.

Locke gives away his inner self too easily, there's only so much of "It's my destiny, it's my destiny" you can take, there's no secrets, he loves talking about himself too much.

[Mighty_Squid]

Sawyer would sell Aaron for a $1.50

[illyriaburkle]

*GASP* :eek: No she di'int! Girl, you're gonna pay for THAT!

At least Ethan isn't headed for the geriatric ward TOMORROW. He's got mad skills, killer instincts, and he isn't afraid to go for what he wants! IF ONLY Locke was as COOL as Ethan, maybe Claire would've gone off on a jungle-love trek with HIM, too!

*hurls massive, Ethan-shaped pillow at Raven AND Illy!*

*blows raspberries at Ali*

Well better to be with someone in the geriatric ward than buried in the ground. I doubt Claire would want to indulge herself in some necrophilia-lovin'. *shudders*

:crackup: Good one Nika. :D

Sawyer has weird "steamrolled hairy potter glasses" and a few STD's. No thank you. As hot as he might look, i'll pass on the Syph

:rotflol: Also of the funny nightskiesfading. :p


*grabs some popcorn and watches the ConMamaians defend their ship* Mmm, I miss ConMama. But not enough to shed my Coake. :p

[PITAchic]

Mmm, I miss ConMama. But not enough to shed my Coake. :p
You can still ship both, ya know :p Because really, I know you still lean towards the ConMama hotness! :raspberry

[capnlou]

Sawyer would sell Aaron for a $1.50

Thats an insult! Sawyer would be able to get a much better price than that!

[illyriaburkle]

You can still ship both, ya know :p Because really, I know you still lean towards the ConMama hotness! :raspberry

Haha, yeah I know, and I do a fair bit, I wrote a ConMama fic for Heather just a few weeks ago. But Coake is my true ship, I ship most Claire-ships (except C/C :rolleyes:) but Coake is where my heart truly lies.

[chair]

she should SOOO be with Ethan (for these reasons)

1. locke and sawyer can't rap!

2. Ethan eats a BIG dinner

3. neither Locke nor Sawyer hung charlie

4. Sawyer gets shot evry 45 mins

:cool:

[illyriaburkle]

she should SOOO be with Ethan (for these reasons)

1. locke and sawyer can't rap!

2. Ethan eats a BIG dinner

3. neither Locke nor Sawyer hung charlie

4. Sawyer gets shot evry 45 mins

:cool:

*snorts* I'd pay to hear Ethan rap, that'd just be priceless. :p

[Ice Berg Legend]

Claire: You're never here for your family!
Ethan: I'm dead!
Claire: You never notice my hair, or my clothes, or anything I do!
Ethan: *hangs Claire* What now bitch??

:rotflol:

ahem...but I still think you're making a big assumption there rather than knowing the real Ethan, I doubt he would ever get violent towards a female especially Claire, maybe he'd slap AnaL around a bit but who wouldnt :p

He beat up Jack (rightly so), he hanged Charlie (rightly so again) and he killed Steve/Scott (which was also justified because they kept confusing the hell outta everyone). He took Claire and Aaron to protect them from the mad French woman. I mean this guy should be knighted for his services to the community.

What's Locke done except get Boone killed, trust Charlie and get himself fooled by the con-man. And Sawyer - setting up Charlie to get Sun hurt, killing a frog, stealing the guns, stealing and hiding stuff from the other survivors etc etc etc.

*gets bulletproof pillow out for protection*

[Kind]

Ethan rapping...

I'm rappin' Ethan
And I'm here to say
If you wanna kill hobbits
Hangings the only way
I say the only way
Breakdown

[AliCat]

Ethan rapping...

I'm rappin' Ethan
And I'm here to say
If you wanna kill hobbits
Hangings the only way
I say the only way
Breakdown
pah, chkk, a pah pah chkk
wikky wah, wikky wah..

Makes me miss the days of EClaire 1, when chair busted out the EClaire Raps. *sigh*

*hurls pillows at ConMamians, who THINK they're winning*

I'd like to see SAWYER try to rap. That boy's so white he don't even know what "bling" means.

[illyriaburkle]

I'm rappin' Ethan
And I'm here to say
If you wanna kill hobbits
Hangings the only way
I say the only way
Breakdown

:rotflol: Niiiiiice.


*hurls pillows at ConMamians, who THINK they're winning*

I'd like to see SAWYER try to rap. That boy's so white he don't even know what "bling" means.

:crackup: True Ali, very true. Ethan's obviously the best choice for Claire because he can hang hobbits and rap. Possibly both at the same time. ;)

What's Locke done except get Boone killed, trust Charlie and get himself fooled by the con-man.

*knifes Ice's bulletproof pillow* Well Ethan got himself beaten up by Jack and shot by Charlie. So nyah! :raspberry

[Ice Berg Legend]

*knifes Ice's bulletproof pillow* Well Ethan got himself beaten up by Jack and shot by Charlie. So nyah! :raspberry
good thing I was wearing a large medallion underneath my shirt :D

Took 6 people and 4 rounds to kill Ethan

Sawyer got punched twice by Jack and he did nothing, Locke was manhandled by Jack and did nothing - how can these two possible Claire suitors look in the mirror after being on the receiving end of the cry-baby Jack :p

[Mighty_Squid]

Locke got shot IN THE HEAD and lived.

Ethan is such a wussy and dies.

Sawyer whines about band-aids and falls down.

Locke wins.

[MasterMinion]

I'd like to see SAWYER try to rap. That boy's so white he don't even know what "bling" means.
*has mental image of chav-sawyer* BWA HA HA! ok, i need to manip this ...

[AliCat]

Locke got shot IN THE HEAD and lived.

*slings Monty Python pillow at Squiddy*

"It was just a flesh wound!"

Our man Sawyer took it in the shoulder, DUG OUT THE BULLET HIMSELF, and LIVED to con LOCKE, now didn't he? Locke, he was BARELY GRAZED, and fell over like a wussy after being shot by a GIRL. <end ConMama support>

[MasterMinion]

but dudes, we're forgetting that Ethan managed to look totally harcore, hung charlie, kicked jacks @ss, freaked out half the camp and took claire on a romantic escapade - all in one day!

[NikaChan]

But see, that's all Sawyer can do, is con. He doesn't have any other skillz except cry and whine like a little baby, "My stuff, my stuff, stop going through my things that I stole from dead people that I had no respect for!" :D

Oh, and Ana-Lucia kicked his ass on top of that.

Minion, I love your avi and sig, it's so cool. I still give Ethan props for what he did to Charlie.

[Kind]

Good point, masterminion. That's a lot for a day. He didn't take no for an answer.

[PITAchic]

Oh, and Ana-Lucia kicked his ass on top of that.
He was shot and starting to get an infection at the time; takes a real bitch to beat a guy when he's down like that.

[Mighty_Squid]

Where is Ethan?

Dead.

Where is Sawyer?

Playing his little games and ignoring her completly.

Where is Jack?

Off crying somewhere.

Where is Locke?

SLEEPING RIGHT NEXT TO HER

Booya!

*chucks tiny purple pillows in all directions*

[Kind]

Where is Ethan?

Dead.

Where is Sawyer?

Playing his little games and ignoring her completly.

Where is Jack?

Off crying somewhere.

Where is Locke?

SLEEPING RIGHT NEXT TO HER

Booya!

*chucks tiny purple pillows in all directions*


Swish.

[NikaChan]

He was shot and starting to get an infection at the time; takes a real bitch to beat a guy when he's down like that.

Ana-Lucia could beat Sawyer regardless if he was shot or not. She took down Goodwin's ass.

[PITAchic]

Ana-Lucia could beat Sawyer regardless if he was shot or not. She took down Goodwin's ass.
Goodwin was weak, and he was stupid because he was an Other.

*throws pillow at Ethan supporters* :raspberry

[Kind]

Goodwin was weak, and he was stupid because he was an Other.

*throws pillow at Ethan supporters* :raspberry

Yeah, I mean, who was Ethan even fooling?

Besides 48 people...

[PITAchic]

Yeah, I mean, who was Ethan even fooling?

Besides 48 people...
Yes, and you know who else he fooled? Who took him hunting with him? "You're a good hunter, blah blah blah." Yeah, well, you're dumb, Locke. :p

[CutieKitten]

:nod:
Locke had no, I repeat, no clue that ethan was an other..then when Claire got kidnapped, him and boone found the hatch and completely forgot about Claire and her 'rescue mission'

[PITAchic]

Oh yes, that's so true. His little hunting party with Boone turned into an "It's all about Locke" adventure to find out what was in his beloved hatch. And the man sacrificed Boone in an instant because it's "what the island wanted." So if he got sick of Claire, I wouldn't be surprised if she up and disappeared, or some tragic accident befell her, because, ya know, it's what the island wanted.

[Kind]

Damn you and your logical arguements! I must refer to the illogical!

Sawyer is a giraffe in disguise.

[PITAchic]

Damn you and your logical arguements! I must refer to the illogical!

Sawyer is a giraffe in disguise.
:crackup:

Locke is a frog in disguise. :raspberry

[NikaChan]

Hey, if Locke never had his "hatch" kick, then they wouldn't have discovered Desmond. And Claire would have never received her peanut butter. So it's not Charlie who gave Claire the peanut butter, but Locke all along, because of his explorations. :D

[AliCat]

Hey, if Locke never had his "hatch" kick, then they wouldn't have discovered Desmond. And Claire would have never received her peanut butter. So it's not Charlie who gave Claire the peanut butter, but Locke all along, because of his explorations. :D
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Take that! *hurls temprapedic side-sleeping pillows at Meggles*

[PITAchic]

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Take that! *hurls temprapedic side-sleeping pillows at Meggles*
Hey, that was a diss at Charlie; why the heck would I argue with that? Though, Charlie almost took down Hurley to get that peanut butter......

[Kind]

:crackup:

Locke is a frog in disguise. :raspberry

Frogs have long tongues.

...

Inapproriate, that?

[NikaChan]

Hey, that was a diss at Charlie; why the heck would I argue with that?

Because Charlie is standing in our way of our beloved ships. I say we need to organize a party to get Ethan back, so he can take out Charlie once and for all, THEN we can argue who is best for Claire. :p

[PITAchic]

Frogs have long tongues.

...

Inapproriate, that?
Giraffes have... long "necks" *cough* ;)



EDIT:

Because Charlie is standing in our way of our beloved ships. I say we need to organize a party to get Ethan back, so he can take out Charlie once and for all, THEN we can argue who is best for Claire.

Deal!!!

[Kind]

Locke can stab Charlie, Ethan can hang Charlie, and Sawyer can sleep with Charlie and never call him back, breaking his little black hobbit heart.

[MasterMinion]

Frogs have long tongues.

...

Inapproriate, that?
i have a feeling i won't be able to sleep tonight ...

Giraffes have... long "necks"

no, i definitely won't ...

[AliCat]

i have a feeling i won't be able to sleep tonight ...



no, i definitely won't ...
Claudia! What are you doing here? Cover your ears, young lady!

Everyone, please! Don't forget the CHILDREN! :p

*hurls pillows mightily at Meggles and Kind*

[Ice Berg Legend]

Locke can stab Charlie, Ethan can hang Charlie, and Sawyer can sleep with Charlie and never call him back, breaking his little black hobbit heart.
:rotflol: poor Sawyer he must have been really out of it to *be* with Charlie

[NikaChan]

Locke can stab Charlie, Ethan can hang Charlie, and Sawyer can sleep with Charlie and never call him back, breaking his little black hobbit heart.


That sounds great! We have a whole bunch of fun activities going on. I think it should be arranged as such, so the festivities last longer:

Ethan's Charlie-Pinata Jambori

Sawyer's Hot-Slashy Lovin'

and to end it all we will have Locke's Charlie Sacrificing to the Hatch Gods

:D

[PITAchic]

Hey, at least Sawyer could pull off hot slashy! :p

[MasterMinion]

Hey, at least Sawyer could pull off hot slashy! :p
you saying locke couldn't?
hmmm ... locke and hurley ...
ethan and goodwin ...

[AliCat]

Hey, at least Sawyer could pull off hot slashy! :p
One word: EWWWWWWWW!

Sawyer and Charlie? Ok, Meggles, YOU WIN. They can have each other. :p This way, Locke gets Claire.

Thread closed! :crackup:

[MasterMinion]

One word: EWWWWWWWW!

Sawyer and Charlie? Ok, Meggles, YOU WIN. They can have each other. :p This way, Locke gets Claire.

Thread closed! :crackup:
*cough* what about ethan? *cough*

[Kind]

Ethan tripped over Charlie's corpse (died of exhaustion, after all the Sawyer slashy madness) into a pit full of the island women who never seem to get any (Rose, Danielle) and is ravaged to death.

[PITAchic]

One word: EWWWWWWWW!

Sawyer and Charlie? Ok, Meggles, YOU WIN. They can have each other. :p This way, Locke gets Claire.

Thread closed! :crackup:
That is so not what I meant! NO Charlie! But come on, who's sitting there daydreaming about a slashy Locke? Well, me... and maybe Raven and Gabs and everyone else on the Loko list (go Loko! That right there is fate, I tell ya).

I was just going for the "Sawyer is hot no matter what" card. :raspberry

But come on now, can't you just see the Loko love? I mean, they would be so hot. And they both have invested interest in the island. That's good enough for me!

And can I just throw out again for good measure (because I have to go to school now) that Sawyer's tent is RIGHT NEXT TO Claire's.... so when Locke and Eko are down in the hatch, pushing each other's button's-- wait, I meant pushing the button :p , then Sawyer can go over to Claire's and protect her.

[Mighty_Squid]

If by "protect her" you mean steal her stuff then yeah I see that.

[Kind]

Sawyer is scum. If she pissed him off, he'd punch her in the baby.

[Ice Berg Legend]

damn thats harsh, I'm sure he'd just steal the nappies and cradle

[Kind]

Ethan probably eats babies.

At least Aaron would be warm.

Claire would be able to check her reflection in Locke's head, confirming her prettiness everyday.

[CutieKitten]

If by "protect her" you mean steal her stuff then yeah I see that.
He didn't steal her stuff, okay, so he got the diary, but he didn't read it :nod:
Locke keeps too many secrets from people, he should open up more, As for Jack, Claire has aaron, she doesn't need Jack too. Ethan wanted Claire so bad he kidnapped her, took her to other camp, then when she appeared again hecame back for her..then Charlie came along and shot him :no:

[nightskiesfading]

Sure all these arguments are great, BUT, Locke could teach aaron how to shoot guns at ranch bottles and throw knives at trees, those are all usefull skills while living on such a dangerous island. What if Zeke were to come out of the trees? Sawyer would probably trade Aaron for some sunblock, and Ethan would want to go hang with his friends, but NO Locke and his newly taught pupil Aaron would get their ranch shootin' tree stabbin' asses out their and send Zeke back home!

[the filthy scene]

Locke will probably die before Aaron turns eight years old. Even if he did live to see him as a pre-teen the amo would most likely be gone, and Aaron would have by then impaled himself on one of Lockes 400 knives. You argue that Sawyer is dagerous? Yes, he is a conman, but you are all forgetting that he COMPLETELY cuts off a deal when a child is involved. He knows what it's like to be abandoned, have an awful childhood, and I beleive that the greatest knowledge come from experience. And I know all the coakers are saying hey, Locke was screwed over by his parents, but not when he was a small child himself, and when he was a small child he was in foster care, he did not witness and live through anything similar. Sawyer would be a wonderful father.

Ethan is dead. necrophelia is illegal, and even if they decided it wasn't for his or sayids sake, I don't think Claire would get busy with a dead guy. And I do beleive he would be violent with a woman, I don't think dragging a pregnant girl through the jungle (yes she was dragged) then hanging a man in front of her (we heard her SCREAM) is very caring. obesession is not the equivolent of loving.




*brings out pillow shooting tank*

[Mighty_Squid]

Ethan is dead. necrophelia is illegal

There is no law on the island. ;)

[the filthy scene]

I will quote mine-self

necrophelia is illegal and even if they decided it wasn't for his or sayids sake, I don't think Claire would get busy with a dead guy.

she hath virtue, and shalt not get busy with thine dead guy, tis yucky (and I doubt his equipment would work since he's dead)

[AliCat]

she hath virtue, and shalt not get busy with thine dead guy, tis yucky (and I doubt his equipment would work since he's dead)
Sorry, in this debate, all participants are ALIVE.

*tosses pillow at... who's it gonna be... COAKERS!*

[Mighty_Squid]

*Catches the pillow*

Experiance has it's benifits.

*cough* Locke *cough*

[the filthy scene]

well if Aaron ever decides he'd like to work in a box company or be handicapped, we'll know who to send him too.

[Jade1021]

(yes she was dragged) *
READ MY LIPS no sign of stuggle
*mutters* nnooo sign...no sign...nnnnooo sign of stugle*rocks and hugs knees*

*hit vanessa with spiky pillow* (I felt punkish today)

[Mighty_Squid]

well if Aaron ever decides he'd like to work in a box company or be handicapped, we'll know who to send him too.

I was refering to sex.

Which we know he at least had a lot of with Helen.

[PITAchic]

I was refering to sex.

Which we know he at least had a lot of with Helen.
If we're talking about teaching Aaron about sex now (and I am so hoping we're not serious :p ), who knows more about it than Sawyer? Come on now.....

[nightskiesfading]

Sawyer sure could teach him how to screw over a woman and get money, but I'm sure Locke has had plenty of experience in his day (or atleast with helen...) and could teach sweet old Aaron about how to find a girl he cares about...if we are talking about this...we mean yeaarss down the line when Aaron is much older. As to not seem creepy or break any rules ;)

[PITAchic]

Sawyer sure could teach him how to screw over a woman and get money, but I'm sure Locke has had plenty of experience in his day (or atleast with helen...) and could teach sweet old Aaron about how to find a girl he cares about...if we are talking about this...we mean yeaarss down the line when Aaron is much older. As to not seem creepy or break any rules ;)
I'm sure Locke can also teach Aaron the finer points of phone sex, should they hook up some kind of coconut communication system in the next few years. But then again, the old man may have croaked by then.... :p

[Eternal_Darkness]

But look how much more fun we'll have than the Skaters and Jaters!


:p Is that making fun of my thread? :p

Hey, EClairians!

Coake would win in a pillow fight hands down, cause Locke is evil enough to put knives in his pillows! :rotflol:

[nightskiesfading]

*whacks you with a pillow*

I'm sure Ethan could tell lovely stories to Aaron about when he and his mother first met...kidnapping her in the woods while she was 9 months pregnant, dragging her a few hundred feet, erasing her memory....we'll get the home movies strip of it in the next episode ;)

[Mighty_Squid]

I was refering to sex with Claire.

You know the person who will benefit the most from it?

As far as Aaron goes John can teach him the proper way to treat a woman.

Which is NOT by the way either stealing her money or dragging her through the jungle.

*Throws a lemon scented pillow at PITAchic*

EDIT

You did NOT just say Locke was evil did you ED?!?!?! Did you?!?!?!?

[illyriaburkle]

Dudes, if anyone is going to teach Aaron how to treat a woman right, it's Ethan. On his first date with Claire, he hung the hobbit that was annoying her, then whisked her away to a romantic getaway in the jungle. If only everyone experienced a first date like that! ;) :p

*smacks Ali with a pillow just for fun and switches back to Coake-mode*

[NikaChan]

If we're talking about teaching Aaron about sex now (and I am so hoping we're not serious ), who knows more about it than Sawyer? Come on now....


Who has Sawyer had on the island so far? No one. Now Sayid has gotten his groove on so has Jin...but I think if anyone should teach Aaron about sex it should be Sayid.

Hmmm...I haven't seen any Sayid/Claire shippers here in this pillow fight, have ya'll?

[_Erica_]

Ed said Locke is evil enough to put knives in his pillows! ;) She didn't really mean evil

Why the hec I'm defending Locke? :eh:

Anyway, why are you all talking about teaching Aaron, isn't this debate supoused to be about Claire? :p

*throws small, pink Ana-Lulu shaped pillows at everyone*

EDIT: Nika, you are genious! Clayid :nod: Forget Conmama, I'm sooo shipping this from now on :p

[illyriaburkle]

*waves hand* I ship Clayid! :p But then, I ship all Claire ships (except C/C *shudders*). Haven't written any Clayid fics, but I have a Clayid icon on LJ. :p

[NikaChan]

Yay! I'm a genious! :p

[Eternal_Darkness]

I was refering to sex with Claire.

You know the person who will benefit the most from it?

As far as Aaron goes John can teach him the proper way to treat a woman.

Which is NOT by the way either stealing her money or dragging her through the jungle.

*Throws a lemon scented pillow at PITAchic*

EDIT

You did NOT just say Locke was evil did you ED?!?!?! Did you?!?!?!?

I meant in a good way! If that's even possible..... But, come on, you know Locke isn't good all the time! Sides, doesn't Claire want to have someone who can be both good and bad? ;)

[wesh]

whoooot! EClaire day is upon us!! Too great! :)
*throws massively huge pillow in the air, shoots it multiple times and watches feathers rain down on everyone*
*then takes pillow canon and shoots hard pillows all around*

[Kind]

Ethan is dead. necrophelia is illegal, and even if they decided it wasn't for his or sayids sake, I don't think Claire would get busy with a dead guy.

Yes, but Sawyer is dead inside.

[CutieKitten]

Saywer just needs some love *throws pillow* :p
By the way, didn't Locke, stalk his dad? he was always hanging around by his house..Stalker dad? :no:

[_Erica_]

Saywer just needs some love *throws pillow* :p
By the way, didn't Locke, stalk his dad? he was always hanging around by his house..Stalker dad? :no:

HAhaha :rotflol: good point Bert. So we have another stalker, look like only Sawyer isn't guilty of that

*throws banana shaped pillows at Coakers* :p

[Kind]

Sawyer stalked a boar. And that's all kind of wrong.

[CutieKitten]

HAhaha :rotflol: good point Bert. So we have another stalker, look like only Sawyer isn't guilty of that

*throws banana shaped pillows at Coakers* :p

hehe, thank you Eri :rotflol:
HA! At least sawyer isn't a stalker and doesn't have..weird..obsessions, Locke is seriously obsessed with the hatch :nod:
*throws pillow feathers around room, as well as glitter* :p

EDIT: he didn't stalk the boar, he just hunted it down because it ruined his tent, Locke stalked his dad thats just scary :p

[_Erica_]

Sawyer stalked a boar. And that's all kind of wrong.

So did Locke :p ( more than once )

Oh and he also stalked Charlie :nod:

[LadyIrina]

For the record, if anyone tricks me out of one of my kidneys, they may consider themselves stalked! :eh:

[CutieKitten]

So did Locke :p ( more than once )

Oh and he also stalked Charlie :nod:

:nod: Now..thats a REAL crime..stalking Charlie :no: now Locke would be Stalking-Charlie-Dad...
*fast voice*
Locke gave a knife to walt! who was 10! a BIG Knife! Now is that responsible?! is it? is it?! :p *balances pillow on head*

[nightskiesfading]

responsible? Locke gave Walt a knife with adult supervision and because he was special :nod:

Sawyer made fun of Walt and Ethan drug a pregnant woman through the woods!

[_Erica_]

For the record, if anyone tricks me out of one of my kidneys, they may consider themselves stalked! :eh:

:crackup: Sorry, it's just the way you said it... Ok, so Locke wasn't stalking his father, he was stalking his kidney :nod; making sure it felt healthy :eek:

[LadyIrina]

It just shows how much of a considerate man Locke is! :D

[nightskiesfading]

Yeah, Locke had reason to "stalk" his father, he went years without him then he finds him and their all buddy-buddy, then the guy runs off with his kidney

Sawyer has his reasons for trying to find the real Sawyer, Locke has his for parking in front of his dad's house everday.

[AliCat]

Yeah, Locke had reason to "stalk" his father, he went years without him then he finds him and their all buddy-buddy, then the guy runs off with his kidney

Sawyer has his reasons for trying to find the real Sawyer, Locke has his for parking in front of his dad's house everday.
IMHO, a man has the *right* to stalk his own kidney. Just because it's in storage in another man's body doesn't mean that it isn't still his. It's careful guardianship.

Claire should be so lucky. *sniff, sniff*

*whaps Eri with pillow*

[LadyIrina]

But did either of them come up with the "hello there" line, and give them the Stare?? Did any of them bother to decorate a tree in Claire's honour? Suffer through mud-wrestling with Jack?
I think not!
:p
Ethan charms, courts and fights for his girl! :D

[CutieKitten]

Locke has his for parking in front of his dad's house everday.

:rotflol: that sounds funny :p Locke does have his reasons but that is still creepy...
*shivers* Locke was almost..like..obsessed.
Sawyer did take his time to find the real sawyer, but he was tricked and killed the wrong guy. and he didn't spend hours and hours infront of where the man was, but he was also determined to find the real sawyer.
Ethan kept a friendly watch (tribulations of ethan rom :rotflol: ), and...yeah, thats about all I got :p :rotflol:

[LadyIrina]

(augh, Bert, that song! :eh: )
And, yeah, poor Ethan really tried to help out Claire!
It wasn't his fault everything went so wrong! :p

[AliCat]

:rotflol: that sounds funny :p Locke does have his reasons but that is still creepy...
*shivers* Locke was almost..like..obsessed.
Sawyer did take his time to find the real sawyer, but he was tricked and killed the wrong guy. and he didn't spend hours and hours infront of where the man was, but he was also determined to find the real sawyer.
Ethan kept a friendly watch (tribulations of ethan rom :rotflol: ), and...yeah, thats about all I got :p :rotflol:
Yeah, Locke took his time... And what did Sawyer do? He JUMPED to conclusions based on another man's lie. He didn't take time to think things through or consider the fall-out, did he? He just ACTED without thinking. That's not Locke, and that's not Ethan. Ethan bided his time, looking out for Claire the whole time. What's a little stalking in the name of true love, huh?

*whaps Bert with heart-shaped purple pillow*

[CutieKitten]

*rubs head where the pillow hit, then balances same pillow on head* :p :)
*Yoda voice* Locke didn't exactly act, he just stalked..Sawyer did rush and act immediately but he was waiting for a long time to find the man, and he was convinced he had found the right man. *Ethan was an other man..dodadoda* :p Well we all know ethan cared a lot about claire, and he wasn't stalking her, and he did us all a favour by hanging charlie. Ethan is the new king :bowdown:
and isn't it weird, that just when Claire begins to hate charlie, Locke suddenly becomes a family friend? :eh:

[LadyIrina]

Locke has been friends with Claire for a long time, didn't he make the cradle and stuff while she was still thinking Charlie was a somewhat sane person? :cool:

[CutieKitten]

Yes but they didn't talk much after that, then charlie is off the picture and Locke becomes really close to claire and her baby..:nod:
*Ethan was an other man*

[Mighty_Squid]

Ethan knows the islands secrets.

He can protect her and her child better than anyone.

Really, who can't beat up Charlie?

That's not really saying much.

*tries to find the right pillow to throw but gets confuse on what is up and what is down and what side she is on again*